Internet Defenders: Let’s Love Justin Bieber Again

Am I allowed to say this? Poor Justin Bieber.

Bieber-sympathy is an unpopular opinion to take. Seth Rogan recently announced his distaste for the young musician, and he’s type of guy about whom people say things like, “Man, if Seth thinks you suck, you must be a real asshole.”

Justin Bieber has been acting like an asshole, though. Didn’t he pee in a bucket onstage or something?

But I don’t care. People do stupid things. Alice Cooper once allegedly bit the head off a chicken.

A clip from the Ellen Show made Internet rounds today where Bieber did one of those fake-out things celebrities love so much — actually, attention famous people everywhere: the whole “I’m pretending we pre-filmed this, but I’m secretly about to run on stage any moment” was made popular by high school rallies nationwide, and the gimmick was cool maybe…twice. Just be real with us and appear on stage the first time around. You guys watched too much magic growing up.

Anyway, Justin Bieber appears on stage. And he shows up with this really nice new hairstyle that’s a perfect, flow-appropriate blend of windswept, but not trying too hard, and not too much product either. Looks like he just raked his fingers through his hair before saying something positive, like, “Let’s do this!”

You can just tell he’s excited to be there. Justin Bieber trots as quickly as he can with his teeny legs and striped tunic, more eager to give Ellen her flowers and underwear than a child who has made his parents breakfast in bed.

After a bit of a shout out to Calvin Klein underwear, he drops the knowing grins and gets kind of a real for a minute. He acknowledges that he’s “done some things that may not have been the greatest.” Haven’t we all? Our lives just aren’t filmed by TMZ. And he’s participating in the Comedy Central roast — probably because his manager told him it was a good PR move — but also because he wants to be able to laugh at himself.

Nothing’s more endearing than that.

Except his actual apology with these cool side effects:

Our society venerates the Bad Boy. Look at James Dean or Danny Zuko or Johnny Depp. But for some reason Justin Bieber was never allowed into this spotlight. He went from “Baby” singing baby to teenager too quickly, and we didn’t like it. I think it’s because to earn that title, you have to first “man up.”

That’s what Justin did today on the pristine white couch of Ellen’s stage. He in his tiny pants with his little legs and his lovely face. He was earnest, and real. It made me feel like I know him. Like he was the little shit next door who went from purposely blocking your driveway, to picking you up a set of red reflectors because he happened to be at Home Depot and think of you.

He’s a bad boy reformed. 

Watch him end up with Taylor Swift.