Part One: What happened to Robert N. Franz III

I was 'touched'. From a playful but studious college-bound class president who led the raising of more money for his class than any class had ever done at that time in my public high school, to a poor, sad, miserable psychiatric-treated patient, my independence would not come until later in life. I have the early competence and confidence to do well -- comeback is certain. Let me show you what happened:

Since I had learned to "do as I was told" while young I would continue to do the very good things which would irritate the rebel norm in others. I became an Eagle Scout when scouting wasn't popular. I went towards the popularity in high school through school plays and politics when sports and jocks were in demand. In early college years I was hated and 'kidded' because every Friday I volunteered at a local hospital. People thought my way of "becoming a doctor" was by one of being a 'goodie two shoes'.

The hate and jealousy surfaced in my third year of college when a classmate encouraged me to get drunk and tied me to my bed on my stomach naked to have a half dozen people rape me. I was so shaken that this changed my future. I drank more and could trust no one -- life was dark.

For years I went in and out of denial about this event. For years I drank way too much making life very difficult. For years I was unemployable or under-employable and could not face the slightest challenge. I was so entirely ineffectual in life that I would only drift from person to person and job to job. Paid psychiatrists were my only 'friends.' Emotionally I had drifted off from attachments to anyone -- isolation came on strong.

Now I have proven that I can handle long term relationships. Now I know I can work on projects of my own. Now I know a 'knife' when it is thrown my way.

At one of my last jobs some supervisors gave me a four-year-old boy with epilepsy to be in my general swim class. By administratively not looking at this problem accurately it eventually become a safety issue at the pool. Both the boy and the instructors were put into untenable circumstances. Any way you look at it a 'knife' was thrown.

As far as I can see these 'knives' suck. I know that sometimes I can see them coming but other times a warning is needed by a compatriot. You don't know how I want to prevent these visions of horror from coming again. You don't know how I hate to see the vulnerable become maligned and used by the more powerful.

It's one thing to see two people equally argue. It's another to see a violent action (or even an attitude) come when one person (or group) is stronger than another.

I vow to help the 'weak' in this world before I die. I want to see those who use others completely exposed and punished. I will not stop until all can feel comfortable on equal footing. Justice must be served.Bob Does Everything Backwards: Writing Out of an Illness Or check out the paperback --The Stigma of the Mentally Ill: Bob Does Everything Backwards

Thank you for reading this;
Truly yours,

Robert N. Franz