Yes I Can!

On Saturday I gave a workshop at the NESCBWI Encore 2010 Conference. It was a 3+ hour drive to Providence, RI, and I spent the entire drive feeling increasingly nervous and panicked. How big would the crowd be? Would they be willing to do the exercises I had planned? Would anyone dare to read? Would my voice shake? Would my neck get all blotchy? Would I lose my place? Would I SUCK???

By the time I arrived, I had worked myself up into a great big mess. My hands were shaking. BUT...

When I stepped inside, I realized something at once. John Bell was finishing up his talk and the audience was very comfortably asking him questions. While the crowd was on the large size (about 90 people), they were sitting at tables and casually asking questions, taking notes, sharing whispers to a neighbor who didn't quite hear that last bit. People were smiling, nodding their heads in agreement to what John was saying. Laughing. What did I realize?

It was SCBWI! My people!

Even though I was still really nervous, once I reminded myself that these people were me [and I am not saying that in a patronizing Christine O'Donnell sort of way, I mean we are all writers with similar dreams-alas, when I told that joke at the beginning of my talk, I'm not sure anyone got it because not everyone is a political news junkie like me], I no longer thought I was going to throw up. Yay! :-)

And, people DID share what they wrote for the writing prompts I gave. And what they wrote was beautiful. Powerful. Painful. The best feeling in the world is to stand up in front of a crowd, give them a prompt, and five minutes later know that in that room are 90 stories, 90 memories written on scraps of paper. Maybe to be forgotten, sure. But maybe maybe maybe to be discovered later. Enjoyed. And turned into something more.

After my talk, people actually came up to me and thanked me. And truly, that is the headiest, most rewarding thing about public speaking. It's what makes those panicked drives worth it. And also, it was a reminder to myself that I do have something to give. And it's pretty amazing to be able to share it.

Thanks for the opportunity, SCBWI!


NOTE: It's November first! jonowrimo ers, we have one month to go to reach our goals! Good luck, everyone!!!

NOTE ALSO: Don't forget to VOTE tomorrow! :-)

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Write to the prompt, "In the deep, dark woods..."