MR Writer’s Club: When Did You Lose Your Virginity?

Were you:

a) In the backseat of a car

b) On the wing of an airplane

c) Eating lamb balls in a bathtub

d) Playing baseball while mastering a headstand

e) Other

If other, specify _____________________.

I could have just left it at that — added the bit about a 500 word count, our officially unofficial hash tag (#mrwritersclub), the email address for submissions (write@manrepeller.com) and your deadline (which, duh, is next Friday at 12PM).

But it’s important that you know the following: at Man Repeller, we believe that to lose your virginity could amount to such an extensive range of incidences, it might be harder to navigate than the gluten free pasta aisle at Whole Foods. (For example, I just lost my hugely terrible analogy virginity to a sentence about gluten free pasta.)

Let me take this three degrees further: I lost my lying virginity when I was five and my mother asked me if I had washed my hands after I peed. I did not.

I lost my cell phone virginity when I was in 8th grade; my dad bought it for me on the condition that I would pay him back in 150 hours of back massage. We had a contract written up and everything — I still owe him 149 hours and 51 minutes.

I lost my Vegemite virginity on Wednesday when I arrived in Brisbane, Australia. If I could take it back, I’m not 100% certain that I wouldn’t.

Make sense?

Of course, de facto virginity stories are widely welcome too — I was wearing socks when that happened. But I’ll leave the decision making to the narrator. (That’s you.) So, go ahead. Tell all. Or none. We’re waiting.

Original image via the Sunday Times Style Magazine