The Rules Of Storytelling

After years of carefully honing my writing, I have finally devised a universal set of rules that covers the art of storytelling. Following these rules will all but guarantee you success:

Add more ninjas. No story has ever been written that could not have been improved by adding more ninjas. But what if ninjas don’t make sense in the story? Fool. Ninjas always make sense.
Add a dragon. What’s not to love about dragons? They’re huge, breathe fire, and can eat any characters you dislike. The only...