#MarauderMonday: 69 Ways Ninjas Can Kill You
It’s Marauder Monday, which means there be pirates, ninjas and other naughty fellows on the loose! Be wary and keep your wits about you, as there are raiders, plunderers, pillagers, looters, robbers, highwaymen, freebooters, bandits, banditos, rustlers, brigands, buccaneers and corsairs lurking around every corner.
To start with, let’s take the mighty ninja.
Ninjas can kill people in a remarkable number of ways, some of which involve weaponry, and others that involve hand to hand combat. This is just a brief list of some of the many ways in which you might die at the hands of these mysterious warriors.
Decapitation by shinobigatana
Decapitation by kusarigama
Decapitation and explosion by bakuhatsugama
Decapitation by jutte
Decapitation by kama (scythe)
Decapitation by naginata
Decapitation by ninjato
Decapitation by oh-gama
Decapitation by Ronin knife
Decapitation by wakizashi
Decapitation by X-claw triple blade dagger
Decapitation by yari
Blood loss due to being kicked with ashiko
Choked by bakuhatsugama
Explosive damage from bakuhatsugama
Flailed and strangled with chigiriki
Blown up by bombs
Blown up by grenades
Poisoned by poison gas bombs
Blinded by flashbombs, then decapitated
Blown up by explosives packed with shrapnel
Blown up by land mines
Burned to death by incendiaries
Poisoned by fukiya (blow gun)
Grappling hook to the head
Sneak hitsuke (fire) attack, following by decapitation
Butted with jukendo rifle, then run through with bayonet
Run through with jutte (ten-hand weapon)
Poisoned by kakute (iron rings with spikes)
Strangled with kusari-fundo (hand-held weighted chain)
Smothered between the thighs of a kunoichi (female ninja)
Blinded by metsubushi (sight remover), then decapitated
Beaten to death with nunchaku
Smothered slowly in quicksand
Blood loss or poisoned by shuriken (throwing star) attack
Beaten to death in taijutsu (unarmed combat)
Wrestled down and beaten to death in jujutsu combat
Thrown against something sharp or solid enough to crush one’s spine in aikido combat
Grappled to submission and then thrown against something sharp or solid enough to crush one’s spine in judo combat
Betrayal and destruction at Ninja University
Speared through the heart by yumi and ya (bow and arrow)
Bitten by zombie ninja (technically this results in undeath, after a brief period of death)
Thrown off roof
Thrown down well
Thrown into threshing machine
Thrown off precipice
Thrown onto spikes
Thrown out window of tall building
Thrown off of airplane without parachute
Thrown into pit of venomous vipers
Thrown off dam onto rocks below
Thrown into lion’s den
Thrown into volcano
Thrown into acid bath
Thrown into fiery furnace
Stabbed with arrowhead
Stabbed with daggers
Stabbed with shards of glass
Stabbed with wakizashi
Stabbed with yari (spear)
Stabbed with combat X-claws
Stabbed with oh-gama
Stabbed with kusarigama
Stabbed with bakuhatsugama
Stabbed with katana
Stabbed with kakute
Stabbed with kama
Destroyed in mortal combat (or Mortal Kombat)
Seppuku (ritual disembowelment, self-inflicted)
For still more ways in which you may meet your fate of Death By Ninja, be sure to check out my list of ninja weapons from A to Z, as well as my novella Ninjas of the 512.
Check back next week for more tales of murder and mayhem, featuring more marauders on the loose!
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