Invitation to Tears Read-Along #1

I haven’t seen a year like 2014 since my first year of marriage.

In 2001, I lost my mother-in-law and my husband’s grandpa. Watching my husband pull all his gifts together to speak for both packed services made me amazed as his depth of pain which he faced boldly.  I also watched him in private as he felt orphaned. We were only in our twenties, but we had lost his generational line. Most of the time, after the funerals finished, we were alone in our grief. Our friends and many in our family could not relate to the loss. The ones who could sent cards that I still bring out and treasure.

It’s been 11 years, and another year of grief has taken over my normal pattern of living. In 2014, tears have been my food, they’ve been quick to send me to bed with migraines, to ruin speaking and work plans, to destroy my plans I had to cover the evidence. Puffy eyes have been part of my 2014 fashion statement.

This summer, I’ve been treading water and I’m all too ready to climb aboard the little sailboat that can give us all a respite from the storm.  Suffering is the ocean, grief is the boat. I want to invite you to practice sailing along with me. Join me for a read-along through my newest book, Invitation to Tears: A Guide to Grieving Well as we finish up our series on uncommon spiritual practices this summer. If you join us, you’ll find the tools to grieve well.

Here’s how the read-along will work:

Each Wednesday I’ll post the reading assignment for the week and invite your questions in response to this chapter. You will have from Wednesday morning until Friday at 1pm (MT) to submit your questions. On Friday afternoon, I will record a podcast responding to questions with the help of my co-author Aubrie Hills. The podcast will release the following Wednesday, along with the next reading assignment. The first podcast will begin next Wednesday and will cover your questions from the Preface and Introduction. You can subscribe to the podcasts here. Please note, the Invitation to Tears read along will only be available until September 30.

READING ASSIGNMENT For Week 1 – Preface and Introduction.

 

 

Here are a few supplemental links:

Grief support groups you can join (recommended by thanatologist and co-author, Aubrie Hills).
My favorite poem on acknowledging grief “Never More Will the Wind” by Hilda Doolittle
My tools for grief in 2014 shared in this 4 minute video “Roadblocks to Grieving Well“
Review for Invitation to Tears (in case you’re on the fence)

 

 

FAQ

How do I post my question? Post in the comments, or send confidential questions to mail(at)soulation(dot)org (It’s written out this way to prevent spam)
What can I expect in terms of length for each podcast? 10-15 minutes, perfect to listen to as you walk your dog or on your commute. Subscribe here.
What if I don’t want to post a question, but I do want to comment? Post in the comments, but keep in mind our read-along is not intended to function as a support group through grief. You can join a support group here.
I don’t have a copy, yet. Is it too late? Not too late until the end of September. And you can purchase a copy for your e-reader, such as Kindle here
How can I easily invite my friends to join me? Post a picture of you holding the book on Facebook and write something like Alicia Miller Andre did, “Looking forward to diving into Invitation to Tears by Jonalyn Grace Fincher and Aubrie Hills. 4 deaths in my life so far this year. Anyone want to join me for the Read-Along with Jonalyn [link to Facebook event]?” Or by forwarding this post, or our reviews. 
I haven’t experienced a death of a person, but I have lost something (a relationship, a childhood, a dream, an opportunity, etc), will this Read-Along apply to me? Yes, it will.
I’m not sure I can read every chapter, can I still listen in on the podcasts? Please do!
I need a support group, is that what this is? No, but we can refer you to one at HelloGrief or ModernLoss.

The first podcast will begin next Wednesday and will cover your questions from the Preface and Introduction.

Here is the iTunes link if you want to subscribe to the podcast. It normally takes a couple of hours for the podcast to upload to iTunes so it might be early Monday morning.

If you’re reading via email, click here to listen to the podcast.

I’m happy to answer questions from the comments!

Let’s hoist the sails.

 

 

 

A few questions to consider this first week:

Some of the most painful moments of our life can feel even more lonely when we hear well-intended, but barren words of comfort Have you ever been suffering, from a death, a broken relationship, emotional slapping, a death, a move, a destroyed vocation and heard something like . . .”Don’t be so upset about it, God knows how to fix it.” , “God just needed another angel in heaven.”, “Are you still upset about that? Maybe it’s time to let go and let God.” What other false words of comfort have you heard?
Why do we rush ourselves through grief instead of inviting ourselves to sail into grief? What is holding you back from hoisting your sails?
What grief will you be focusing on during this read-along?

Looking forward to your thoughts and questions. Let’s discover how we can face our pain together.