Where’s the crop???
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After I left this picture for Honey on the counter yesterday evening his first words were:
“Where’s the crop?”
To which I rolled my eyes and thought, Pfft, men!
His second sentence after he put the picture down and then snatched it back up again was… “Is that my beer he’s drinking?”
To which I rolled my eyes again and thought…well, you guys know what I thought, right?
Then later he finds this picture tucked in the frame around our master bath mirror and yells to me,
“I hope he wasn’t sailing around drunk on my beer!”
To which I’m thinking, Drat! That would have been funny if Fred was on his back sailing around. *snap* opportunity missed there, but *stares right at you* not for long. Heheheh. *excuse me for a moment while I go tie a woman to some railroad tracks and twirl my handlebar mustache* even as I try to contain myself for the coupe de grace.
And here she is…
This is the picture I planted right next to Honey’s side of the bed when I got up in the wee hours of the morning to let the poochie out. Can I just say, I’ve never heard Honey gasp. At least I don’t think I have. Grunt, hiss, growl, and grind teeth even, but gasp? Nope, not in all our years. *grins until it turns into a big white-toothed smile* I did this morning. He plucked up Myrtie’s picture and chucked it like a playing card toward the door. Here’s the conversation.
“That thing is snooping on me.”
I sat up and stretched, throwing in a yawn for innocent effect. “What? Who?”
“That creepy-ass troll thing you brought into the house.”
“You mean Myrtie? She’s outside.”
“It isn’t a she, it’s an it and it isn’t outside it was right on my night table.”
I do the wide-eyed ‘Oh my God’ are you sure look. “Myrtie was in our room?”
To which he replied. “This will be your room if I find it in here again. I’ll go sleep somewhere else.”
Now I was the one who gasped because Honey meant it and when he got up and went to brush his teeth I sat there pondering my own stupidity. After all, I should have known better. When a spouse brings a stripper into the house marital discord is bound to happen, right? 
Riley who is going to keep Myrtie out of our bedroom. *insert eureka moment here* But if she manages to find her way into our garage I wonder what he’ll do then? She’d be in one of his FAVORITE rooms after all. Hm. Might be an interesting experiment. I’ll keep you posted. Poor Honey.
