Why You Need to Stop Trying to Control People

It’s too easy to get distracted on our way to the top by people, places and things we can’t control. It’s a way that we sabotage ourselves.

We can get sidetracked by the needs of others, sudden seeming emergencies, and small irritations that take up mental space and interfere with our staying on the  strategic course we’ve set for ourselves.

Sometimes we think that only we have the power to handle a situation, help a friend or give the right advice.  We might think that not taking control in these situations is giving up our personal power. It’s hard to let go but the reality is the more we try to solve other people’s problems or push them to follow our advice, the less control we have and the less energy is left to take care of our own careers while other people who are not burdened with the need to “help” or who are able to stay on their path, pass us by.

That’s when we have to let go of people, places and things we can’t control.  By letting go, we hold on to our own goals and our own possibilities for success and moving forward.

Each of us has to decide whether our own success is important, whatever success means to each of us. We have to know on a deep level that our needs are so important that we don’t put other people’s needs ahead of them. This is the time to take action, and take control of our actions.  When we find ourselves wavering in our convictions, or doubting our worth or self-love, that’s the time to call on the people who love us and will keep us on track.  That’s the time to call on our personal crew that I wrote about last week.

-Simma Lieberman, "The Inclusionist"
Career Coach
www.simmalieberman.com