Trouble with Possums
Well, anyone who’s been following my Twitter lately has seen that I’m currently fighting off a possum invasion. And by “fighting off” I mean “doing nothing to prevent it”. I think I'm going to start telling people it's an elaborate promo scheme for JA Rock's
Trouble At Possum Ranch
. That's plausible, right?
A few people have asked about animal control. Now, I could hire a possum trap, but it’s after trapping them that things get tricky. Possums are a protected native species, so you can’t hurt them (and look at those cute little faces!). You also can’t relocate them more than fifty metres from where you trap them. Fifty metres? THEY COULD STILL SEE MY HOUSE FROM THERE!
So that seems a pointless expense.
Anyway, the other day at the hardware shop I was looking at screens, thinking that I could tack it up around the shutters in my house, and damn the aesthetics. And then I remembered that possums have been known to peel back tin in order to get into roofs.
So that seems like a pointless expense as well.
At the moment, I think bribery seems like the best option. It’s worked before. In the Great Possum Invasion of 2012, after Cyclone Yasi knocked down a bunch of trees, the possums were breaking in and stealing bread and bananas and whatever they could get their clever little paws on – they can also open cupboards – I ended up leaving food outside for them. I agreed to do this, and they agreed not to break in unless I forgot. Or was late. Or they wanted something apart from bananas.
Anyway, once the trees grew back the possums went back to their old diet.
Another option, of course, is earplugs. Because here’s the thing. If the possums break in and I don’t hear it, it doesn’t count, right? Ignorance is bliss. That way, if I come out of my bedroom in the morning and there are things knocked onto the floor, I’ll just blame the cats.
Now, I don’t hate possums. I just wish they’d remember that they are outside animals. Particularly when it’s midnight, this is my bathroom, and I really, really need to pee.
I peed anyway. With a towel over my head for protection.
A few people have asked about animal control. Now, I could hire a possum trap, but it’s after trapping them that things get tricky. Possums are a protected native species, so you can’t hurt them (and look at those cute little faces!). You also can’t relocate them more than fifty metres from where you trap them. Fifty metres? THEY COULD STILL SEE MY HOUSE FROM THERE!
So that seems a pointless expense.
Anyway, the other day at the hardware shop I was looking at screens, thinking that I could tack it up around the shutters in my house, and damn the aesthetics. And then I remembered that possums have been known to peel back tin in order to get into roofs.
So that seems like a pointless expense as well.
At the moment, I think bribery seems like the best option. It’s worked before. In the Great Possum Invasion of 2012, after Cyclone Yasi knocked down a bunch of trees, the possums were breaking in and stealing bread and bananas and whatever they could get their clever little paws on – they can also open cupboards – I ended up leaving food outside for them. I agreed to do this, and they agreed not to break in unless I forgot. Or was late. Or they wanted something apart from bananas.
Anyway, once the trees grew back the possums went back to their old diet.
Another option, of course, is earplugs. Because here’s the thing. If the possums break in and I don’t hear it, it doesn’t count, right? Ignorance is bliss. That way, if I come out of my bedroom in the morning and there are things knocked onto the floor, I’ll just blame the cats.
Now, I don’t hate possums. I just wish they’d remember that they are outside animals. Particularly when it’s midnight, this is my bathroom, and I really, really need to pee.
I peed anyway. With a towel over my head for protection.
message 51:
by
Julio
(new)
Feb 25, 2014 09:47PM
*smoothly transitions from giggling to cackling*
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Oh and Gecko's - when their feet dry up and can't hold on anymore they drop on your head! Never a good experience.
Robyn QF - get Booked for life! wrote: "Oh and Gecko's - when their feet dry up and can't hold on anymore they drop on your head! Never a good experience."Lol! I remember when I was a kid and we were living in New Guinea, my mum took the lid off a boiling pot on the stovetop. The cloud of steam hit a gecko, who fell off the ceiling and into the pot.
I think we had sandwiches that night.
Lisa wrote: "Here's one thing I know about frogs: They don't like it when you pee on them by mistake"
He didn't look terribly happy, took off behind the s bend and pretty much stayed there after that.
He didn't look terribly happy, took off behind the s bend and pretty much stayed there after that.
Robyn QF - get Booked for life! wrote: "Lisa wrote: "Here's one thing I know about frogs: They don't like it when you pee on them by mistake"He didn't look terribly happy, took off behind the s bend and pretty much stayed there after t..."
Poot thing! But hey, that's what you get when you hang around in toilets.
Its too hot for possums where I live, just have to make do with dugites, red backs, goannas (cute!) and motorcycle frogs in the pool.
Lisa wrote: "I think we had sandwiches that night. "
Probably the best option - not much protein in geckos
Probably the best option - not much protein in geckos
Crispy wrote: "Its too hot for possums where I live, just have to make do with dugites, red backs, goannas (cute!) and motorcycle frogs in the pool."I'll keep my possums over red backs any day!
Robyn QF - get Booked for life! wrote: "Lisa wrote: "I think we had sandwiches that night. "Probably the best option - not much protein in geckos"
Also, too many tiny bones.
Seeing as they absorb through their skin, I kinda get why uric acid might be uncomfortable for them. Geez. Some interesting kinks down under.
my thing is, why are they always trying to get up to the ceilings? what the hell kind of invisible deliciousness have they sniffed-out up there?(still obsessed with the possums)
Lisa wrote: "Crispy wrote: "Its too hot for possums where I live, just have to make do with dugites, red backs, goannas (cute!) and motorcycle frogs in the pool."I'll keep my possums over red backs any day!"
You think you've got it all sewn up in the cutest wildlife in Oz competition, hmm. Should I mention the giant cockroaches of far north Queensland? :0
Crispy wrote: "
You think you've got it all sewn up in the cutest wildlife in Oz competition, hmm. Should I mention the giant cockroaches of far north Queensland? :0"
No, you shouldn't mention them. Ever!
You think you've got it all sewn up in the cutest wildlife in Oz competition, hmm. Should I mention the giant cockroaches of far north Queensland? :0"
No, you shouldn't mention them. Ever!
Ok, I won't but Lisa could train them to chase away the possums, just sayin'
I just grew up with 3-4 inch cockroaches that fly at your head when you turn on a light. How big are the giant cockroaches?
Twice that size and horrifically ugly. They possess a sinister sort of intelligence too. I've heard that they can sniff out human fear and track their victims across continents.
How fast are they? Big doesn't scare me, speed is something harder to deal with.
Crispy wrote: "Twice that size and horrifically ugly. They possess a sinister sort of intelligence too. I've heard that they can sniff out human fear and track their victims across continents."And they send them hate-tweets beforehand to ramp up the horrified anticipation.
Between this post and Kynth's rat-pie status update, GR = Good Rodents.With those furry tails, your possums look like cute little mischief makers. The North American opossums are totally creepy, especially at night. Got me wondering about the difference:
http://www.bobinoz.com/blog/4013/poss...
Fast, in the wild they munch on banana leaves and sugar cane, processing that into the equivalent of rocket fuel. And, if they crawl into your shoes, with those jaws and teeth like something out of Alien... Gawd, they're deadly.
Emma Sea wrote: "Crispy wrote: "Twice that size and horrifically ugly. They possess a sinister sort of intelligence too. I've heard that they can sniff out human fear and track their victims across continents."A..."
You got it, ;D
^--- this is why I don't live in QLD! That and Cane Toads.
Who doesn't shake out their shoes? Okay, looks like a fun game with a baseball bat though, right? Smash the roaches. I totally would have been up for that.
Golf clubs work well too, especially for the toads
I guess roach motels don't work well when they are that big. Cats, dogs and small children would get stuck.
I had a friend over there who had cane toads so big they dug tunnels under their front verandah, they had to get the house restumped. Mind you, the toads were probably trying to avoid the giant cockroaches.
Whatever you guys are having, I want one as well. Nah, make it a double.
I think the Aussies here are scaring the non-locals. New tourism ad "you think you've got balls? come to Australia, we'll scare the crap outta you!"
I know, but its great fun! If you can't scare the crap outta your friends occasionally then life wouldn't be worth living. I haven't even started on the sharks or crocs :)
Or the stick insects the size of small children
Oh yeh, I think they just hang out in the tropics like the top of WA, QLD and the NT. Some people have them as pets.
Crispy wrote: "I haven't even started on the sharks or crocs :)"You know what makes me truly shiver with fear? Irukandji
Yeah, I used to live in Darwin and some of the insects I saw scared the watsis outta me!
Emma Sea wrote: "Crispy wrote: "I haven't even started on the sharks or crocs :)"
You know what makes me truly shiver with fear? Irukandji"
Ooh yeah and they're really small too! Little bastards.
You know what makes me truly shiver with fear? Irukandji"
Ooh yeah and they're really small too! Little bastards.
Robyn QF - get Booked for life! wrote: "Yeah, I used to live in Darwin and some of the insects I saw scared the watsis outta me!"True, the cockroaches in Darwin could start their own footie team, they are the biggest I've seen anywhere.
Emma Sea wrote: "Crispy wrote: "I haven't even started on the sharks or crocs :)"You know what makes me truly shiver with fear? Irukandji"
Yes those evil little buggers are mucho scary, I remember all the warning signs along beaches in Darwin and QLD.
And i thought palmetto bugs were bad. *shudder*
Vanessa wrote: "And i thought palmetto bugs were bad. *shudder*"err, cockroaches actually are palmetto bugs, or a species of.
Robyn QF - get Booked for life! wrote: "^--- this is why I don't live in QLD! That and Cane Toads."Hey, we're sharing the cane toads! Everywhere will have them soon...
(Sorry about that.)
I went swimming in the ocean the other day. We have the nicest beaches up here, but you have to swim in a net because of the jellyfish. Which kind of ruins it a bit.
Emma Sea wrote: "Crispy wrote: "I haven't even started on the sharks or crocs :)"You know what makes me truly shiver with fear? Irukandji"
I don't understand why the patients aren't put into artificial coma.
Steelwhisper wrote: "I don't understand why the patients aren't put into artificial coma. "This is from In a Sunburned Country
Well, sedated and unconscious isn't exactly in full anaesthesia. That's why I asked. That's what they do with the really severe burn victims, and I doubt that this nerve pain tops burns of 3rd degree. Has to be a similar level. I you switch out the brain it's switched out.
Conversely, this has reminded me of my bunny about malfunctioning anaesthesia... *leaves and ponders*
Emma Sea wrote: "Steelwhisper wrote: "I don't understand why the patients aren't put into artificial coma. "This is from In a Sunburned Country
"
I like the bit about him being "inflated with morphine". Which end did they plug in the pump is all I want to know.
Crispy wrote: "I like the bit about him being "inflated with morphine". Which end did they plug in the pump is all I want to know. "http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-...
Steel, from 5:25 here they say that because the symptoms are so varied, doctors have to know what is coming next, so "putting a patient under is risky."
Emma Sea wrote: "http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-..."Man, man, man, Emma, you find the damndest things :D
Emma Sea wrote: "Crispy wrote: "I like the bit about him being "inflated with morphine". Which end did they plug in the pump is all I want to know. "http://www.bbc.co.uk/news/world-asia-..."
I know I'm going to regret it but I'm going to to look anyway
Steelwhisper wrote: "I don't understand why the patients aren't put into art..."It may be that it's dangerous to put people into full anaesthesia if they've already got a body full of toxins from the sting. Most deaths seem to occur right on the beach though, before medical attention even has the chance to arrive. There was a local case a few years ago of a young boy who was incredibly lucky to survive after being stung -- he immediately went into cardiac arrest and only survived because an intensive care nurse happened to be walking on the beach. She kept him going long enough for the ambulance to arrive.
Emma Sea wrote: "Steel, from 5:25 here they say that because the symptoms are so varied, doctors have to know what is coming next, so "putting a patient under is risky.""LOL, I wonder whether a patient would see it like that. I'd say to them going under is preferable.
Note to self: never swim anywhere Pacific.
