Office Apropos? Part Three

Day 1

Leandra: Nothing says Monday like pinstriped, high waist, camel-toe inducing denim (Stella McCartney) and a t-shirt/plaid blouse (H&M and American Apparel respectively) combo that evinces the spirit of the Brawny man, am I right? I’m wearing a necklace that my mom designed and made for me. On it, there is a big hand nurturing a little hand. She calls it “a mother’s love for her child” which seems ridiculously long as a name for a piece of jewelry she intends to sell publicly. We should just call it Hand-in-Hand. Right? The bracelets are Dannijo and the boots are Chanel.

Amelia: Today I’m wearing shoepants. Shoepants occur when the fabric and color of both your pants (in this case: H&M) and shoes (Zara) are so similar that they appear to become one. It was accidental, and in retrospect makes me sorry I didn’t wear an actual leather-footed onesie under my sweatshirt. I forgot mascara, hence the pink Westward Leaning shades, and it is winter, hence the coat (by Maje).

Charlotte: The way I combatted the frozen tundra that kicked off the week was by piling on the layers. Here we have a Beanie warming my head, a little stole cloaking my neck (thanks Grandma), a J. Crew coat, some Rag & Bone shoes and Ray Ban glasses shielding my eyeballs which have frozen.

Day 2

Leandra: Tuesdays always seem the most appropriate time to wear theatrically diminutive hats that serve no purpose and every purpose all at once. Personally, I don’t mind looking like a lurid asshole and that’s what I hoped this outfit might explain to you. The pinstriped sweater is Stella McCartney (do you notice a pattern?) (Hot damn, this Mango one is similar) while the turtleneck beneath is Splendid. The jeans are by Textile and I am really into the zippers. The white boots are incredibly impractical and Isabel Marant. The jacket is from the anterior’s collaboration with H&M.

Oh! And duh, the tiny little baby ass-hat is by Maison Michel.

Amelia: Look at me, laughing on a Tuesday. LOL Tuesday, I always say. Here’s me missing New England in my Barbour jacket, Ralph Lauren cable knit, J. Crew button down and zip up pants. Sunglasses are Céline, shoes are Zara, cow goes moo, etc, etc.

Charlotte: Sadly my leather pants did not result in shoepants, though it is probably for the better that they didn’t affix themselves to those Zara clunkers or I may have toppled on over. It’s Tuesday so I’m all about comfort evidenced by my fuzzy-ass Vince sweater ASOS pajama shirt.

Day 3

Leandra: Evidently, no one else got the memo that Wednesdays at Man Repeller are dunk your head in a toilet full of extra virgin olive oil day! Silly fuckers. If you can manage to get past the state of terrible hair for which I am repeatedly the victim, you might notice that I, too, tried to emulate Amelia’s tango with shoepanting but failed — but then again, who cares because I own the coolest embroidered Dries van Noten mens blouse in all of the world. I bought it 70% off which makes my heart want to sing an Elton John song. The leather pants are by Helmut Lang. The boots are Zara and my jacket is Céline. Sorry for that sentence.

Amelia: So my face is really big, huh? I’m standing two feet away from the door that leads back into our office why I have no coat on GRANDMA. Mitch Hedberg once compared turtlenecks to tiny hands that choke you all day long, so this pair of tiny choking hands is by Club Monaco. The jeans are Denim & Supply, the boots are Tibi.

Charlotte: Rain — you’re tacky and I hate you. I picked up that neoprene rain shield also known as a skirt from Reformation. The army jacket is vintage, the shoes are Rag & Bone and that good ol’ reliable flannel that hugs you even when the sky is crying is a Ralph Lauren hand me down.

Day 4

Leandra: Cold legs, be damned. Today I wore a new pair of Falke stockings in the name of an experiment that begs the question: how long do expensive tights last? The answer, evidently, is through the same evening’s wine glass numero tres. The shoes I am wearing are Valentino. My leather skirt is from All Saints and my striped shirt is from Zara. The denim jacket is Acne and I think looks gr8 under a houndstooth blazer (this one, by Stella McCartney). The neck scarf is Isabel Marant and tomorrow is Friday!

Amelia: I just bought this Être Cécile sweatshirt because it reminded me of Jil Sander FW11. It’s my new favorite thing I own, but since it’s sort of intense and I don’t want to become known as Geometric-Sweatshirt-Girl, I’ll have to space it out a bit. My jeans are Frame Denim, shoes are Hache y Eme and when I wear them I feel like Harry Styles.

Charlotte: Couldn’t wait ’til Plaidurday so here I am, an homage to my Scottish ancestors. The blazer is Topshop, jumpsuit & creepers are Zara, and my bagpipe is unfortunately not pictured (Sorry great-uncle MacGregor).

Day 5

Leandra: I like for my Friday outfit to be influenced by a number of different sources. Today, the first was Amelia which by the transitive property of Geometry also means a father-figure from Maine as evidenced by the ivory fisherman sweater for which I definitely overpaid because it is Marc Jacobs but come on! That mock-neck, man. The second, unassuming inspirer is my oldest brother Haim who spent most of his adolescence being fat and wearing denim. These jeans are for him. The third is Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz for obvious reasons tethered to my sparkly-ass Valentino shoes and finally, my coat is equal parts homage to Kim Kardashian and Sally the Camel. I can’t tell you why.

Amelia: Happy Hoo Ha it’s Friday. Normally this is a sneaker and pants optional day for me, but since I’m meeting friends after work at a “nice” place for drinks I decided to Step It Up 2. My blazer is by Band of Outsiders, shirt by The Row ($ample $ale $core), jeans are 3×1, shoes are Tibi and the sunglasses are Westward Leaning. The necklace is this cool pocket watch handed down from my grandpa to my mom to ME, Amelia.

Charlotte: It’s Friday so I’m unleashing my inner 12-year old boy, hence this knit sweater that belonged to uncle back in the days of yore. The jacket is another vintage score, the shirt is Madewell and the denim is Rag & Bone. I broke into Leandra’s last night and stole those Zara boots (just kidding she has baby feet so I resorted purchasing my own pair because they’re that good).