As another birthday approaches, I ponder cake and mysteries

What I’ve learned so far in my forty-some years is that I will continually be amazed by all I don’t know.

Some years I get reflective as my birthday draws near and some years I just want to eat cake. This is an eat cake year. Except for this moment, I am pondering life and all its mysteries.

I will never know where we came from, why, and where we go after we leave this plane. I have flickers of insight and I think perhaps I will be The One who gets the divine download and all the answers. So far, I still have just as many questions as the next guy.

What I do know is that we have a lot more control over our circumstances than we think. My reality is pretty much up to me. Life does not happen TO me, life happens for me and through me. What I bring to the situation is the most determining factor of what I will get out of the situation.

All the talk about attitude and mental mindset is pretty spot on. The key is to be constantly feeding our self with stuff that keeps in that good attitude and mindset.

My first home office was filled with sillies and pretties. Everywhere I looked, something made me smile. A photo of my boys, an old 45 mounted on the wall, a bulletin board full of whimsy. The next office was a bit more office-y, but Prince Charming and I painted it and threw glitter over one wall.

The current home office was set up to be business and professional, cuz I am a “serious” entrepreneur now. Nah. I have discovered that feeding my soul with pretties and sillies is how I best operate, and my biz flourishes when I am NOT all business.

I guess what I have learned in my nearly 50 years (next year is gonna be a BIG party!) is that life is a lot of trial and error. We are ALWAYS learning as we go. We try something, we tweak, and we keep or discard.

The path keeps winding and new discoveries are always around the bend. I have traveled, lived and loved, and love bigger and deeper than ever imagined. I’m glad I lived this long to know love like this exists.

I like foods now that I never did before. I gave up things (Coke) that I never thought I would. The girl who avoided speech class in college is now thrilled to be a keynote speaker. I’m still flat chested, still get pimples, still cover my grays.

Books still thrill me. Music moves me. Movies delight me. I keep meeting cool people doing cool things in the world and my hopeful nature expands every day.

There is so much I don’t know. I don’t know the “stars” of reality television and I don’t care. Pop culture is rolling around without me, and that’s fine with me. A true sign of aging. My smartphone reminds me of that every day. What I know of technology is just enough to know that I know very little.

With every new exciting and wonderful thing I discover, it alerts me that there is much I don’t know. Understanding that is wisdom.

I will never have all the answers. The signs on my desk tell me to live with passion and to enjoy life. That’s enough for me, at any age. Now, let’s have some cake.

(Kelly Epperson is author/speaker/coach who knows she doesn’t know it all. Kelly’s clients write their books, live their joy, and eat cake. Programs starting now. www.kellyepperson.com)