Breaking Down the Walls of Perfection
Deconstructing spirit.
That’s what I call upon when I’m over-analyzing, over-criticizing, and just plain being maniacal!
Perfection is the disease of what I call the “decay of spirit”. It eats away at your soul, and infuses you with ridiculous notions that steep your brain like a hot tea bag.
Do you remember what it felt like as a child to sink your teeth into ANYTHING without even the slightest notion of expectation?
Do you remember what it feels like to say “YES” to things you have denied yourself in the past for fear of looking silly, or not being good enough?
And do you REMEMBER what it really feels like to ALIVE and FREE when you allow yourself the liberty of truly letting go?
The truth is that we’re NOT telling ourselves the real TRUTH. We say we embrace the “imperfectly perfect” outwardly, but just how many of us are REALLY being honest with ourselves in how we view and treat ourselves?
How many of us are willing to let go of outdated ideals, and a veneered reality that doesn’t actually exist? And how many of us actually ENJOY the process of decay in our souls when we constantly focus on what’s not right all the time?
I ask you this one simple question…
What does PERFECTION look like?
Surely we all have our own ideas of how we want our life to be designed. We build the dream of how we want to appear on the outside, from our homes, to what we wear, or how we want our children to ‘turn out’. We chase these ideas moulded into neat and tidy packages of a “groundhog day” existence, and yet we forget that within us exists the most valuable asset of all.
Our SPIRIT.
And just “WHY?” you ask am I such an expert on the whole idea of perfection? Who am I to wax lyrical about the connection that we all have irreplaceable and undeniable value, and how we are already more perfect than we could ever want to be?
A few years ago, I wrote a blog post, that for ME personally broke the seal. It was a revelation of a broken spirit, the cracking of the chrysalis, and the blessing of deconstructing spirit to reveal the sweetness within.
That post “Imperfection is Perfection” was my coming out. It was the moment where I allowed myself to “let go” and know that those cracks were put in place for a reason (and I’m talking about me here, not my beautiful daughter Ruby). As any addict will tell you, it’s not the actual vice of the addiction that kills. It’s the decay of the spirit in not being able to see the truth.
For me, that decay stemmed from an unwillingness to be able to really ask myself what it was that I was afraid of? What did I FEAR so intensely that I actually stopped LIVING? It wasn’t until the moments when I allowed myself to be pulled out of the chaos of the perfect storm, that I was able to really notice the way the light fell around me,
or to see that my children’s unruly hair could bind me in a spell of intricacy that I’d never knew existed before.
In my hunt for “perfection” as I’d always known it, I was missing those beautiful moments right beneath my nose. Every. Single. Day.
So when I say I call upon deconstructing spirit to help me break down the walls of perfection, I really mean that I’m just able to dissect life in all it’s truth and ACCEPT it for what it is. To really sit in the silence, and listen to the voice within. In breaking down the walls of perfection, we need a killer sense of perception, and an acid wash of reality. I’m not saying to throw away your dreams of that beautiful home, or that you should dress like a slob, or have unruly kids. What I’m drawing attention to, is the idea of the marriage of those DREAMS, alongside a NEW paradigm of acceptance and admiration for our cracked existence, and that we are MORE THAN ENOUGH the way we are.
To use all of the senses, to really FEEL what our soul longs to feel, and to really see that everything that surrounds us, and all that WE ARE is pretty shit hot the way it is.
You see, it’s all about perception, and a shift in attitude. To see the cosmic joke in life, is to really see that we are all BROKEN, and that the junkyard of life is pretty damn spectacular the way it is.
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