GAAngsta's Paradise - an Irish rap

A little bit of Irish social commentary - (rap it in your head to the original Gangsta's Paradise by Coolio feat LV).

As I shuffle down High Street struggling for breath
I take a look at my wife and realise she hasn’t left - yet
Which is kinda surprising, considering what’s been going on
With pay cuts and no hair cuts and no manicures and so on


The wallet’s pretty empty but I guess I deserve it
After all I’m just a gutter living, whining public servant
Enough negative, I got a job, I should be grateful
We ain’t eating beef steak, we gotta eat pork, so


The kids need clothes and stuff, ’cos they gotta look cool
But my shoes are puppy-chewed and I dress like an old fool
A meal out these days is a trip to KFC
And the mot tries saving money at Lidl, or Aldi


We’re wasting all our lives
In Bertie and Enda’s paradise
We’ve been spending most our lives
In a self-deluded paradise


We’re wasting all our lives
In Fianna something paradise
We’ve been spending most our lives
In a paper tiger paradise


Look at the situation they got us all facing
Ain’t nothing gonna be free, gotta pay for everything
Next thing you know they’ll ban hurls in the hood
That ain’t gonna go down well at all with us culchees


We got educated fools in the ivory tower
Got a hurl in my hand, wanna whack ’em in the bollox
Except we don’t wanna complain, wouldn’t be cool
Don’t wanna be a parody or appear like a tool, no


Debt ain’t nothing but a heartbeat away
Them Argos special offers only available til Friday
Equity is negative but I don’t give a flying fuck
We’re staying in this house til we die


Tell me why were we so blind to see
The answer don’t lie in property


We’re wasting all our lives
In a Fianna something paradise
We’ve been spending most our lives
In a self-deluded paradise


We’re wasting all our lives
In Fianna something paradise
We’ve been spending most our lives
In a paper tiger paradise


Powers and Jameson, Jameson and Powers
Paddy Power betting, open til late hours
Playing on the Lotto, playing Euromillions
Planning out your future on improbable statistics, yeah


You say your gonna win but you know no one who has
You got a better chance of winning the local beauty competition
We gotta run, we gotta play, we gotta score
Or else we’re fucked, ’cos this country’s outta luck, bud


We’re wasting all our lives
In a Fianna something paradise
We’ve been spending most our lives
In a paper tiger paradise


We’re wasting all our lives
In a Fianna something paradise
We’ve been spending most our lives
In a self-deluded paradise


Tell me why were we so blind to see
The answer don’t lie in property
And what do we bring to the party
Negative equity


We’re wasting all our lives
In a Fianna something paradise
We’ve been spending most our lives
In a self-deluded paradise


We’re wasting all our lives
In a Fianna something paradise
We’ve been spending most our lives
In a paper tiger paradise

words © by Ruby Barnes

Note: GAA Gaelic Athletic Association