Find a Sponsor, Build a Relationship

We spoke with Rebecca Shambaugh, President and CEO of Shambaugh Leadership, to discover how to get the most out of a sponsor/sponsee relationship. 

You wrote your first book, “It’s Not a Glass Ceiling, It’s a Sticky Floor,” in 2007. What is the “sticky floor,” and how does it affect women?

After more than 18 years of research, we found that there was a certain point in women’s careers when they realized that they were being passed over for opportunities. Somehow their aspiration levels were decreasing, and they weren’t making the progress they wanted to see in themselves. Many thought that this was due to the “glass ceiling,” but these women were actually suffering from an internal belief system that forced them to hold themselves back – that’s what we call the “sticky floor.” It’s the internal voice that self-limits our abilities to take a risk and get out of our comfort zones. 

What differentiates a sponsor from a mentor?

Mentors provide guidance, feedback, and help you think long-term in your career. A sponsor is committed to pulling you up in the organization and finding opportunities that would provide you with greater visibility. 

Where do you look for sponsors?

They need to look outside of their day-to-day environment. Sometimes we get comfortable with our manager or boss and assume they can be a sponsor, but that may or may not happen. You need to look at other areas of the organization to find the people who are respected – when they speak up, everyone listens. Those individuals not only know where the opportunities are, but can influence who gets those positions.

How do you build a strong rapport with a sponsor?

It’s not just about making sure that your sponsor knows your career goals and aspirations, but you also know about them. You know what success looks like for your sponsor. You know what their responsibilities are – so much so that you might be able to take something off their plate to support them. Look for opportunities where you can demonstrate your value and your strengths, so that your sponsor can see you in action and trust you can do the job. 

How willing must the sponsor and sponsee be to stepping outside of their comfort zones?

A sponsor needs to step out of their routine and broaden their lens. If you look for a sponsee like you, then she will likely act like you, think like you, and behave like you. But today you need diverse talent and balanced thinking within teams and organizations. Sponsees need to be willing to take on opportunities with which they aren’t familiar. You have to say “yes” and be confident that you will develop the skill sets along the way.

How does the gender of a sponsor affect this relationship?

There are benefits to having a cross-gender sponsor because he may have a different lens, but not all men will see the value in bringing women’s unique leadership styles to the table, and vice versa. We must all be aware of gender differences, and know that even if someone’s talents don’t align with yours, they still contribute something unique to the conversation. 

What kind of personal relationship is there between a sponsor and sponsee?

You don’t have to necessarily like your sponsor, but you have to respect them, and your sponsor has to respect you. If you don’t have that mutual respect and honesty, then it won’t be a lasting relationship. 

–Lindsay Putnam