I dated a guy in a wheelchair

I dated a guy in a wheelchair.  Yeah.  I don't need any awards, not really.  Plus, it was just one date.  And I was hell-bent on making it a wonderful time for the guy.  His legs didn't worked, but at least he had me.  Part-way through the appetizer I decided I'd marry the guy.  

    I didn't particularly like his personality, but he'd become paralyzed in an accident, so--what the heck--I'd sacrifice my life to entertain him.

    I was sixteen.  Smart enough to realize our marriage might not be that great--solely because my torso was longer than his.  When we went to a movie later that night, he sat three inches shorter than me. I bent my giraffe-like neck, trying to rest my head on his shoulder.  But his shoulder was far lower than mine, and after a while my crooked neck pulsed with pain.

    The movie looked weird sideways--but who cared--I was putting my head on this guy's shoulder 'cause he was in a wheelchair. My vision blurred.  Blood went into my forehead and I nearly blacked out.

    We still didn't get along too well, but it was more romantic than dying in love's embrace.  So I kinda grew teary-eyed, thinking how bad my neck hurt for love.  Someday we'd get married.  I'd be in a neck brace and he'd be in his wheelchair.  Yeah.  



When I was sixteen, I had the best intentions.  It's a good thing the guy didn't marry me--the worst thing that could've happened to him.  He may have been in a wheelchair, but I was the one with an underdeveloped brain.



Anyway, I thought about this memory and laughed out loud.  Did you ever do something completely stupid when you were a teenager on a date?
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Published on May 20, 2013 19:04
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message 1: by Lyn (new)

Lyn Fuchs Teenagers are the goodest and dumbest creatures on the planet. They should be required to carry a special driver's license - oh wait, they are. However, are you sure you were being selfless? Some people have a fetish for tire rubber and cold steel design. Many women secretly desire a permanently-reserved close-up space at the mall.

Before you attempt to use another disabled person, call me, Eliza. I can don a full body cast at the snap of your fingers. Love those sponge baths.

Readers can express their sympathy for my faux-injury by pre-ordering a copy of my new book Fresh Wind & Strange Fire: One Man's Adventures in Primal Mexico on Amazon. You can tax deduct this contribution to the faux-differently-enabled, unless you belong to a conservative group, in which case you might get audited.


message 2: by E.C. (new)

E.C. Stilson Oh that's hilarious! Thanks for this--I needed a good laugh :)


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