Welcome to the Umpire State!

(Maybe Bloomberg will get confused and ban himself)

“Psst.”

“Hey, man. What’s up?”

“You seen Joey?”

“Joey? Nah, Joey’s down in Brooklyn, movin’ some fried onion rings.”

“Aw, man.”

“Why? What you need? I got some nice glazed donuts. Maybe some salted peanuts? 24-ounce Big Gulp?”

“I was hoping to score an unabridged dictionary.”

“Yeah, you and me both, dude. Haven’t seen one of th…”

“Ack! Cheez it! It’s the Mayor!”

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I don’t know if you’ve been keeping up with the news out of New York lately, bu...