Career Coach: Want to Have More Quality Time With Your Children?

In my line of work, I get a lot of questions about work and personal life. While we try to separate our work from the rest of our lives, our identities very much involve both. This gets more complicated when we add parenting. Lately I’ve been hearing many questions about how two working parents can create a loving environment at home, or how parents can leave emotional baggage behind at work to enjoy positive time with the family at home.

The source of answers to these dilemmas is within us. I recently read a blog by Marji Zintz, who calls herself a “Peaceful Parenting Whisperer.” Marji points out that the common thread of parental troubles is a disconnect from Mindful Presence, the condition when a parent is fully present for the child. In her blog post, Three Steps to Mindful Presence, she helps the reader identify how telling untrue stories about our feelings can interfere with the connection to our True Self. Using the three strategies below, parents can begin to regain their connection to themselves and to their children.

Accept your feelings. Understand that your feelings are beneficial tools that serve a purpose. We can make important use of the information that these feelings provide.

Recognize untrue feelings. You may be telling yourself false beliefs about your emotions. The impact of saying “I’m angry” is different than saying “I’m feeling angry.” This careful – and mindful – use of language helps clear the path to our True Self, and helps us better interpret the messages we are receiving and act on them more efficiently.

Move forward. Determine an action that you can take to alleviate the condition that’s causing the feeling. Marji points out that we have incredible inner wisdom to address these feelings and determine actions that move us forward. We can be there fully for our children – with presence of mind – and this makes for quality parenting.

–Andrea Zintz, Career Coach