Sporting Event Of The Week (36)

The game of conkers has come a long way since its first mention in the memoirs of the romantic poet, Robert Southey, in 1821. Initially, the game was played with the shells of snails before in 1848 on the Isle of Wight contestants had turned to horse chestnuts, the first record of their use. In my day it was a great autumnal favourite in the school playgrounds and many a trick, including oven-baking, soaking in vinegar, aging, and coating with a clear nail varnish were deployed to gain an extra advantage. Sadly, health and safety concern have all but eradicated the game from schools, but there are still pockets of aficionados who are determined to relive their salad days and keep the sport alive.

While the World Conker Championships, held annually in Shipston in Northamptonshire since 1965, with its clearly defined and vigorously enforced rules, might be fairly stated as being the Royal Ascot of conkers, the Peckham Conker Championships, its ninth event held on October 4, 2025, is its street-wise rival. Held under the auspices of the Peckham Conker Club, its Battle Royale is where “conkers meets Fight Club”, according to Chris Quigley, its co-founder, and where cheating is positively encouraged.

Contestants come armed with conkers made from epoxy resin, coated in superglue or displaying other forms of “nut pimping” and “tangles”, where you deliberately tangle your string in your opponent’s and tug, and “stamping”, where you stamp on the fallen conker, are all allowed. There are even special moves, such as the Super Chopper, a “rabid helicopter move”, Gravity Strike where you leap high to come down on your opponent’s conker, and Side Winder involving a single or double side flips followed by a 45-degree gravity strike.

The Peckham website provides prospective competitors with details of the rules (very few) and how to perform the various moves. Contestants can even buy for £14 a Nut Sack, containing pre-holed conkers and a Battle Pack Kit.

This year’s winner, a 27-year-old bespoke furniture designer who go by the name of Timmy Nuts, admitted that the contest was “a little too crazy”. At least he came out victorious and unscathed. On the way to his first of two successive championships in 2023 and Italian, known as Pietro the Pummeler, smashed a tooth and blood went everywhere.

The Health and Safety guys might have a point!