Betrayal in a Shaken World: Finding Steady Ground When Trust Breaks

Betrayal is often thought of in personal terms—an affair, a broken promise, a friend who lets us down. But betrayal isn’t just about relationships. At its core, betrayal is the shock of a foundational expectation collapsing. It’s the moment when what you trusted would keep you safe, steady, or true… doesn’t.

That’s why, in times like these, betrayal feels so heavy in the air. When leaders are assassinated, when weather events destroy homes and communities, when systems we rely on—government, corporations, even the climate—fail to protect us, many of us experience a collective form of betrayal. We believed someone or something would keep us safe. And it didn’t.

This week also marked the anniversary of 9/11, one of the most profound betrayals in recent history. Regardless of where you were that day, the attacks left many with the devastating realization that the safety we took for granted could vanish in an instant. For many, the world became a less secure and less trustworthy place overnight.

When public figures are attacked—as in the recent assassination attempt on Charlie Kirk—it doesn’t just impact them or their families. Regardless of what you thought of him or his politics, as humans we don’t expect violence to be carried out against one another. When it happens, it shakes our collective sense of safety and trust. It feels like betrayal: betrayal of the basic expectation that, even in disagreement, we can live without fear of violence.

Why World Events Hurt More When You’re Healing From Infidelity

If you are healing after infidelity, you may notice that global events—terror attacks, violence, political unrest, even natural disasters—hit you harder than before. That’s not a flaw in you. That’s betrayal trauma.

Once you’ve experienced betrayal in one area of life, your nervous system becomes hyper-sensitive. Your trust in the world is already fractured. So when more betrayals—personal or collective—occur, they cut deeper. They don’t just shake your worldview; they confirm the fear that nothing is safe, nothing is trustworthy, and everything can collapse in an instant.

If you’re feeling more raw, more anxious, or more overwhelmed right now, nothing is wrong with you. It’s normal. Your body and mind are responding exactly as anyone’s would after a profound betrayal.

What Betrayal Trauma Really Feels Like

Psychologists often describe betrayal as the breaking of a foundational expectation. It’s not just the event—it’s the rupture in trust. That rupture can feel like:

Shock (“How could this happen?”)

Anger (“They were supposed to protect me!”)

Grief (“The world will never be the same.”)

Fear (“If I can’t trust this, what else will fail?”)

Whether it’s in your marriage, your workplace, or your community, betrayal cuts deep because it dismantles the stories we live by: that our partner is loyal, that our leaders will serve, that nature will nurture, that the future is predictable.

Five Tools to Begin Healing After Betrayal

Betrayal doesn’t have to leave you broken. With the right tools, you can process the pain and begin to rebuild trust—in yourself, in others, and in life. Here are five ways to start:

1. Name What You’re Feeling

Often we minimize betrayal, telling ourselves we should “get over it” or believing that because it didn’t impact us directly, we have no “right” to feel emotional. Naming your experience as betrayal validates the pain and makes it easier to address. Say to yourself: This feels like betrayal because I expected safety, and that safety was broken.

2. Ground in the Present

Betrayal pulls us into spirals of “what if” and “what else will fail.” Slow down and bring yourself back to now. Try:

Placing your feet on the floor and noticing the ground supporting you.

Taking three slow breaths, lengthening the exhale.

Saying out loud one thing that is steady in your life today.

3. Express Safely

Betrayal often brings intense anger or grief. Suppressing those emotions can lead to depression or anxiety. Find safe outlets:

Journaling what you wish you could say.

Moving your body—walk, dance, shake it out.

Talking with a trusted counselor who can hold space without judgment.

4. Rebuild Small Trusts

When the big things feel shattered, focus on the small. Trust the sun will rise tomorrow. Trust your body when it’s hungry or tired. Trust yourself to take one step forward today. These small acts rebuild a sense of stability.

5. Reach for Support

Healing from betrayal—personal or collective—does not happen in isolation. Whether through counseling, support groups, or community connection, being with others who “get it” reminds you that you are not alone.

Healing After Infidelity and Other Betrayals

We can’t always stop betrayal from happening—whether in our intimate relationships or in the wider world. But we can choose how we respond. We can acknowledge the rupture, tend to our pain, and slowly create new sources of safety and strength.

If you’re recovering from infidelity, remember this: feeling more shaken by world events right now is not weakness. It’s a normal part of betrayal trauma. With the right support, you can calm the chaos, rebuild your self-trust, and rise stronger than ever before.

About the Author

Lora Cheadle, JD, CHt, is an attorney turned betrayal recovery coach and author of It’s Not Burnout, It’s Betrayal. She helps high-achieving women move from devastation to wholeness after infidelity and betrayal through her Life Choreography® coaching framework, which integrates legal clarity, emotional healing, somatic release, and spiritual growth.

Download her free Betrayal Recovery Guide for five simple tools to help with feelings of betrayal at www.BetrayalRecoveryGuide.com

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