Guest Post: A Mother’s Blessing: Ditching Dogma on College Move-in Day
Guest Post by Laura Karren Glasgow
On the morning my oldest child left for college, breaking new personal spiritual ground was not on my to-do list. While I had embarked on a faith-expansion journey the year before, I hadn’t yet traveled very far so it still felt important to me that my daughter receive a blessing before she left home. In line with the teachings of the modern LDS church, I saw my husband as the only possible vehicle for this blessing. For reasons I didn’t understand at the time, my husband had not offered her a blessing despite us having discussed his doing so. I knew that bringing it up again would create tension, but the not-proverbial clock was ticking and I still wanted this for her.
That morning, while in the shower and pondering on my desire, I was astonished by a most unexpected thought: I could give her a mother’s blessing. I gasped in surprise and wonder and then I was almost knocked over by what happened next. As surely as water was pouring onto my head, words that were not my own began to flood into my head. Within a few moments I was filled with a clear understanding of what to do and what to say. Just as the wave of surprise began to ebb another surge of feelings crashed into me. I was overcome by a tidal wave of love: my love for my daughter, God’s love for my daughter and God’s love for me. I was grateful for the privacy of a shower where I could freely add a torrent of tears to this unexpected storm of inspiration.
Nervous, but determined, I asked my family to pray with me before we headed to the airport. There were some snickers and eye-rolls, not least from the new college freshman, but I held my resolve, took her hand, and began. I addressed God as I would any other prayer, but then departed from the conventional prayer pattern. Instead of listing things for which we were thankful, I expressed how I was feeling. I said that my husband and I are feeling similar to how They, our Heavenly Parents, might have felt when we left Their home: excited for the opportunities and experiences awaiting our child, but also apprehensive about the greatly increased availability of both happy-ending and unhappy-ending choices.
I prayed that our daughter would feel the love of her parents – both earthly and Heavenly as she adjusted to her new life. I prayed that she would find people that would cherish her as much as we do. I prayed that she would find people who would influence her for good and that she’d be a force for good as well. I prayed that she would have help to make choices that would lead to happiness.
When this blessing-prayer flowed into my mind I could see that it really was no different from what an ordained man would say with the exception of the words “I bless you” having been swapped out for “I pray.” And while the words “I bless you” connote power to command the elements of the universe, no one will ever convince me that there is even one milliwatt more power in an ordained man saying “I bless you” in front of any of those phrases where I said “I pray.”
I did not, obviously, open my eyes to find a patriarchy defeated and lying in chains at my feet. While I had felt a seismic shift inside me, my family didn’t seem to have heard anything other than a normal family prayer. But I had heard God speak to me that day and then I heard myself speak the words of blessing God had given me and I will never be the same.
Laura is a reader, traveler, feminist, and a huge fan-girl of Jesus Christ. Laura works as the Programs Coordinator for a charity that serves refugee and immigrant children and is also a French language tutor.
