This too is Life

(Spoken by Nimue, translated into written word by James)

About a week after the eye operation, I hit what was probably rock bottom. This in many ways was a relief. At that point I knew that in terms of eyesight, things were probably as bad as they were going to get. Knowing that, in any situation, can be really helpful. When you hit rock bottom, the only available move is up. I knew from there, that I’d either have to learn to adapt to what I’d got, or I’d heal, and either way things would get better.

One of the thoughts that came to me at this time was simply ‘this too is life’. I’d been round all of the obvious grief processes with my share of anger, disbelief and inability to make sense of what had happened to me. Life is full of things that we don’t deserve, haven’t attracted and can’t make sense of. My experiences are quite normal in that regard. I’m fortunate in knowing a great many other people’s stories which hold mine in perspective. There’s nothing unique or special about any of this.

The only thing to do with experience is live it as best you can. This too is life. Right now mine is full of things that I’m finding hard, but it’s the life I’ve got. ‘Shit happens’ is a wisdom statement that I’ve turned to over many years. It’s an important, universal sort of truth. There’s not a lot of sense to what life does to many of us. Alongside the privilege of getting older – which so many people don’t experience – is the certainty of health challenges. By prehistoric standards I’m ancient. For most of human history, as a female pauper, I’d be doing well to have got this far. Stories are helpful in not taking this stuff too personally. whatever it brings, what we get is life, and there is no good option but to try and live it.