BEING A SHARK IN CONFERENCE ROOMS IS FINE. BUT PLEASE DON’T BRING HER HOME.
Working in Corporates have made us true sharks. Crafty, rapacious, ready to eat up all the innocence within and outside for an agenda that might not even satiate us.https://medium.com/media/c5ac97631dfb1b878ae73cd426ab5bb3/href
We as women have become loud and proud in order to fit into the Man’s world. Which is totally opposite of being feminine.
From a distance, it feels women have become confident but in reality it’s just a fake confidence. Because that’s what we learnt to do when fighting an argument in a room full of men. We ape them to establish equality.
How I had my realisation?
I was itching. Itching to know why I wasn’t satisfied despite working with the top notch corporates, handling high profile clients.
After deep reflection, I realised I was missing myself. My ‘self’ that existed before I gave in to the Corporate Slavery. Where did I lose ‘Myself’ in all these years? In building other peoples’ brands, where did I lose ‘BRAND ME’?
After spending a lot of time in solitude, dimming the noise of the surroundings, I had some amazing realisations.
I realised that to have a point of view is good but it’s not important to louden your voice to be heard.It is good to give your best at work, but not important to get competitive about it.I realised, it is good to make leaps but not at the cost of your freedom.I realised it is good to jump organisations to make great career moves as an individual but not at the cost of breaking ‘path-breaking teams and partnerships’.I realised that we as women are still hungry for validation which we are seeking in the man’s world by sacrificing our own strengths to fit in.I realised by becoming sharks in our offices, we are bringing same aggression and shrewdness to our relationships and homes.I had many realisations.
By unconsciously picking up toxic masculine traits like abusing, being loud, argumentativeness, competitiveness, having one-up-manship, we are adopting all toxicity under the garb of confidence.
It is a put-on ‘confidence’ which is not real.
It actually is a defence mechanism which we adopted to validate our equality.
Honestly, this fake confidence is eating up our personal lives as well.
Leading us into unsatisfied selves, ignoring our real feminine urges and eventually ending us up in a confused state in our lives.
The penny dropped for me when I saw myself abusing like a man and not being able to let go of that habit from my system.
Definitely the need of the hour is to display courage when required, but could we do that by staying in our own feminine energy without borrowing the traits, tones, the work-styles, the competitive spirit, the shrewdness of our toxic male counterparts. If at all we have to imbibe qualities of the masculine, those should not be the toxic traits but the divine qualities of the healed masculine.
Masculine who chooses to be ‘assertive’ than ‘aggressive’, who is a great leader and goes first in case of problems, who is a giver, who plans for a higher objective than self-agenda, who respects his counterpart and treats her with the sensitivity she deserves as a woman.
Trying to fit in the man’s world like a toxic man is not really helping us. We are bringing the same loud, competitive self to our homes, forgetting to draw a boundary with our own selves.
Homes which require our soft feminine self. Instead of being ‘calm’, ‘intuitive’, ‘nurturing’, ‘creative’, ‘sensual’, ‘compassionate’, ‘collaborative’, ‘vulnerability’, we are bringing toxic masculinity to our families.
Yes, it’s a bitter pill to swallow, but unknowingly we all bring home a toxic man married to another man.
https://medium.com/media/2923f7ea1c581865b225bb8227994264/hrefNo, I am not against women and their dreams but I experienced how this toxicity blocks our flow. I thought its urgent to bring it to light. May me there are many like me, standing where I was once — ‘confused’.
I have a lot of empathy for the gender I was born in. Where we stand, it really is not our fault too. We are being raised as sons.
Parents proudly project,“We have raised our daughters as our sons!” showing that they are fair and treat both genders equally.
But at the cost of being hated I just want to ask, are we really equal as genders.
Yes, we do talk about equal rights but no way are we equal.
Different? Yes.
I wish we were just affirmed this, that we are different with unique qualities and deserving of equal opportunities.
Of course, our parents were doing best for us basis their understanding.
But I wish they also knew the importance of knowing the feminine and masculine within. I wish we were taught about our divine feminine and masculine traits in school. I wish we were taught that we carry the both polarities within. To help us balance, to use our knowledge creatively like an alchemist to master our lives. ( We did have symbolisms pointing out to the masculine-feminine balance through the Shiva-Shakti symbolism but we still failed to decipher what the masters were indicating.)
To know about the positive and masculine polarities, read here…
The institution of Marriage will shut by the next decade.
It is great we are Sharks in our offices but it is time we learn to transition into cute little Penguins at home. We need to know our SELF better. We need to learn to integrate our masculine and feminine self so that we master our lives.
We need to stand in our power as the feminine energy. We need to know that divine feminine traits are beautiful and will help us even in achieving our career dreams.
Else we will end up emasculating our men, and defeminising our own selves and still get nowhere(Emasculation is robbing a man of his spirit, defeminization is depriving a woman of her femininity). All leading to man-woman hatred and competitiveness. All leading to more and more disharmony in and outside of offices and marriages.
(*Penguins — I used this metaphor as I spent many hours in Edinberg Zoo observing their awesome attributes. I found them very feminine in nature. First of all you feel safe around them, they carry adorable charm, they are nurturing and can move in huge circles. And of course, we all know they are known for their loyalty as well.)
[image error]BEING A SHARK IN CONFERENCE ROOMS IS FINE. BUT PLEASE DON’T BRING HER HOME. was originally published in Twin Flame on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.
