The Secret to Being More Human

Why Reading in Multiple Genres Could Save Humanity

“You can only understand people if you feel them in yourself.”

— John Steinbeck

In every group of people who like things, there is almost always a group that tends to become exclusivists. They read only this kind of book, listen only to that kind of music, watch only this kind of T.V. show. They might even be loyal to only a few creators or subgenres within a given artform.

Now, the reasons for such exclusivity may vary. Frankly, the more things we’ve tried, the more right we have to decide that we will limit what we devote our time and money to. And creators cannot continue making art without superfans devoted to their work, so by all means, support those artists!

But there is a dark side to exclusivity, too. Always surrounding yourself with too much of the same thing can result in becoming narrow-minded, even if that “thing” celebrates diversity within itself. (Every art form has its limitations.) It’s the proverbial echo chamber that social media algorithms can produce, multiplied by everything our minds consume.

How do we counter this?

The key, in my opinion, is to engage with people different than yourself. One way to do that is to regularly and deliberately consume art that is outside our comfort zone, and the people who love that art. Why?

Consuming a wide variety of art and getting to know the people who relate to it is one of the easiest ways to increase our empathy. And with more empathy, we become better able to love and get along with our fellow human beings.

Art is, by its very nature, an invitation to empathy. Most creators infuse their art with pieces of themselves or pieces of others that they identify with by using their own empathy.

The cycle of empathy continues when the consumer of the art also opens themselves up to experiencing what the art is about—whether it be a singer's heartbreak, a painter's angst or tranquility, or the problems of characters in a work of fiction.

When we can understand something from someone else’s point of view, we may not agree with it, but at least we’ll tend to look at what we have in common with that person instead of what divides us.

For a personal example, I am not a fan of heavy metal music. But I have friends who are, and who will wax on about the practice and devotion to their craft that a talented musician in that genre must have to be any good.

I am still not a fan of heavy metal music, but I can now appreciate what is required to create it. On occasion, I’ll even listen to some to see if I can hear what my friends are on about. And surprisingly (or maybe not!), I’ve found a few songs I enjoy and that are now on my play list.

Art is, by its very nature, an invitation to empathy.

For a more bookish example, the main character of Finding Heaven is an erotica writer who hates her job. When I started writing that book, not only had I not read any erotica, I confess to having similar judgmental attitudes about it as Sarah does at the beginning of the book.

In Sarah’s case, her attitudes sprang from the wounds of her past—and, as I worked through those with her (empathy!), I also had to address some wounds in my own past that contributed, in part, to my attitude about that genre. We both made peace by the end of the book.

Have I read erotica now? Not exactly. As research for writing that book, I did read the detailed synopses of a couple of popular erotica books to try to understand what it is that appeals to readers and writers of it. I also now know some erotica writers, and they are wonderful people with whom I have more in common than not, and who patiently put up with my questions.

As I learned more and used my empathy, I came to understand that Sarah’s wounds, and mine, do not apply to everyone, and people can like a thing for reasons I can understand, even if I don’t grow to like that thing.

And therein is the root of empathy, and why both creating art and consuming a wide variety of art is such a powerful tool to expand your powers.

Empathy helps us to resolve conflicts, develop better policies and initiatives, be better leaders, be better lovers, parents, friends, and neighbours, and create better art.

Empathy is the result of love, and it also feeds love in a beautiful, self-perpetuating cycle.

Without it, we devolve into selfishness and tyranny. With it, we can be emissaries of love and peace in a dark, selfish world.

This is why we need to consume art that features a wide variety of perspectives, made by a wide variety of creators. Seeing the world from someone else’s perspective helps us to become mature.

Welcome to humanity.

“Could a greater miracle take place than for us to look through each other’s eye for an instant?”

— Henry David Thoreau

This post was originally published in the Books & Inspiration newsletter on 2022-04-19.

Guess what? Every single one of my books explores characters both like and unlike me, and I write, as well as read, in multiple genres. If you’re looking for some low-sensuality books in contemporary romance, epic fantasy, women’s fiction, and more, please check out my Books page . Thanks for reading!

  New Short Story

This week, I also posted a new short story in the Books & Tea League Story Bites section (for all premium members). Check it out. (Requires a Loyalist or higher membership level to access.)

Love Notes: A Short Story

When an empty nest threatens to unravel her marriage, a wife discovers her husband’s trail of love notes that remind her their story is far from over. A romantic women’s fiction short story.

Read the story