Disagreeing Respectfully (Part 1)

Disagreeing is a natural part of leadership, collaboration, and daily life, but let’s be honest—it’s not always easy. And because it’s difficult, we often avoid important conversations, causing a ripple effect later.

In today’s society, we’ve increasingly lost the art of civil discourse, and without respect, we lose trust, collaboration, innovation, and the ability to solve problems together.

Too often, disagreements feel personal, leading to defensiveness and shutting down meaningful dialogue. But what if you could approach disagreements in a way that challenges ideas without disconfirming or invalidating the person behind them?

Here’s the good news: You can. The key lies in asking thoughtful, open-ended questions that promote curiosity and collaboration rather than conflict. Over the next four weeks I’ll be sharing one strategy and hoping you will try the tip and let me know how it goes.

1. Would you be willing to be challenged?

Disagreeing can feel risky, especially in hierarchical relationships. By asking for permission to challenge an idea, you set the tone for a respectful exchange. This question frames your intent as collaborative, not combative.

  Try this: “I’d like to challenge this idea because I think it could make our approach even stronger. Would that be okay?”

  Avoid: Jumping straight into your disagreement without checking their openness—it can feel aggressive and derail the conversation.

Stay tuned and next week I’ll share a second strategy.

To your success,
Marlene Chism

PS: If you need support with leadership development in 2025, or you’re looking for a keynote speaker for your association, please reach out for an exploratory meeting.

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