Over Explaining

Forum: Communication with ADHD

First, I want to explain ( lol ) that there's a   difference between : over sharing, verbal processing ( repeating stories that are complaint in nature ie: venting ) and over explaining ...which is what I do constantly.

Over sharing is saying too much. TMI. Giving out too much personal information to strangers, telling your life story etc. I've done this too....but it's not my issue. I generally don't tell strangers anything about myself and share very little. Unlike, a person who, assumes, once they have you as a captive audience....they corner you with a presumptive attitude...as if, you actually want to hear what they are saying...and usually...it's of a highly personal nature. TMI

Verbal processing is when, something gets stuck in your mental  processing ( usually ...unprocessed negative emotions ) and gets retold over and over in a loop...regardless if it's been heard before. ( to you or anyone else )...repeatedly, over and over.    It appears to be from a high need to get rid of this unresolved negative emotion , by using someone else as a sounding board , and to just nod and just say "uh huh" and hear it again. To be heard.

Over explaining ( giving people too many details ) comes from a need to be understood. Not necessarily emotionally, just understood in general. This is like....if I throw enough examples and references in...they're bound to understand. Just throw more words at them, and eventually they'll understand?

Today at the doctor's office...the Dr summed this up concisely when I told him about having panic attacks, why I have them...and why it's important to know...so I can simply tell my SO what's she's seeing because, what she thinks she's seeing...is not what she thinks it is.   

And he said: "yes, because if a person doesn't have panic attacks they can't relate to someone who does because they've never had one."

I thought to myself.... Wow, that really explains alot.