Alternate usage for books

Sometimes, people get a painful lump on the back of their hand or at the place where the wrist joins the hand. It is called a Bible cyst, but it could just as well be called a dictionary cyst or any heavy book cyst. The nickname comes from the fact that this cyst can be cured if someone has the nerve to hit themselves square on the cyst with a book as heavy as an old family Bible. The sac of the cyst will shatter, and it will be cured.
So far, I've only had one brave soul that tried it. Magic. No more painful cyst. (In that case, I think we used an old boring textbook which might have seen its first good usage that day)
Generally, however, I would recommend the traditional usage of books: exploring their inner contents and finding joy in the universes of marvel inside...