​Are worried that your child is not FOCUSING?

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A post shared by Dr Debmita Dutta - Parenting Expert (@debmitadutta)

​Are worried that your child is not FOCUSING?
Then see if you are making these 5 BIG MISTAKES

MISTAKE 1
Asking your child “WHAT ARE YOU DOING” when they are doing something with FULL FOCUS.
Stop now!
Interrupting children destroys their focus. 
Do this – 
• Watch in silence 
• Ask questions with interest when they come to you to show you what they have done
MISTAKE 2 
Telling your child “DO IT LIKE THIS – NOT LIKE THAT” when they are trying to do something
Stop now!
Trying and discovering how to do something requires intense focus. Showing your child how to do things the right way all the time robs them of the opportunity to focus intensely and build focus.
Do this – 
• Allow your child to make mistakes and learn from them
• Give them a small suggestion if you see them getting frustrated
MISTAKE 3
Praising your child while they are doing something and saying “OH THIS IS SO NICE”
Stop now!
Praise shifts them from intrinsic motivation to extrinsic motivation. The level of focus is not deep when the motivation is extrinsic.
• Wait in silence until your child finishes
• Motivate them with a smile when they look at you
• Appreciate what they have done when they ask you
MISTAKE 4
Repeatedly telling your child “DON’T MAKE A MESS”
Dividing their focus between what they are doing and the mess they must not create – results in your child’s focus becoming half of what it is
• Allow your child to make a mess as long as it is not harming them
• Never shout at them for making a mess
MISTAKE 5 
Insisting that your child does what you want them to do and not what they want to do saying “DO THIS NOT THAT”
When your child does something they want to do – they are intensely focused. The focus is not as deep when they do something you want them to do.
Do this - 
• Tune in to what your child is doing
• Teach your child what you want to teach them through what they are already doing
FOCUS IS THE SECRET TO SUCCESS
Of course, you want your child to succeed – but because you are not PARENTING with NEUROSCIENCE you could be destroying your child’s chances of being SUCCESSFUL by making these mistakes
START PARENTING WITH NEUROSCIENCE.
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