a playground for me by isha agrawal

29/04

“If I ask you something, do you promise to be honest?”

Silence. 

“Say something.” 

More silence. 

“Fine, in that case, I’ll just ask. Did you steal me from someone? Why are you so scared to let me go? More importantly, what are you so afraid of? What’s waiting for me on the other side that you simply do not want to let me go?” 

“The world is a scary place, my dear.”

“How can I know that when it’s your word against mine? I need to see it with my own eyes, Mama.”

“Dear-

“Please Papa, let me be happy. Let me play and have fun before I grow up.” 

“Dear.” 

“No! I wanna play!” She cries. 

Her parents share a concerned look that goes unnoticed by the twelve-year-old girl. 

“All my friends are going to the field trip but you won’t let me go. Please let me play in the garden.” she cries, looking longingly at the garden from the balcony too small to fit three people. She’s only ever been there with her parents or whenever her friends came over, but even then one of her parents accompanied her. At twelve, the little girl was quite stubborn and hell-bent on what she wanted. But despite how tiring her awful crying could be, her parents never budged or took pity on her. 

Her adamance didn’t come from nowhere after all. 

“No. it’s four in the evening. Go study while your mom and I finish the business meeting.” 

“But today is Sunday, Papa!” 

“Go do something in your room then, my dear.” 

Mama looked between them and nodded her head in agreement. “Papa is indeed correct.”

She cried, stomping her feet as she made her way to the bedroom. Her denim dungaree that was a size too big until then suddenly began to feel too small. The little girl wasn’t aware but her clothes just depicted her life – that she was trapped and couldn’t change out of it if she didn’t want Mama to be angry later while washing two pairs of clothes which in turn would ruin Papa’s mood. 

So the little girl went to her desk, grabbed a book she’d borrowed from the school library, and began to read, the only playground she could afford at the time and that age.