I Pee-D on Myself!

There is something hilarious, ridiculous, and absurd not to mention embarrassing about what I am about to tell you, but with it is an exceedingly serious and important message for us all.

Long ago, when I was an alcoholic at an Ivy League university, desperately obsessed with alcohol, sugar, men, and bars, I got so drunk one night while doing my usual bar-hopping that I pee-d on myself.

I was wearing light-colored pants so the pee was unbelievably obvious and most likely stunk as well. I had the...