BFFs Bonding over Murders

Sneha Jaiswal (Twitter | Instagram)

It’s the 2020s and the easiest means of communicating with our friends is no longer video-calling, texting, or meeting over drinks, but simply sending each other funny memes and videos, react with an emoji and repeating the circle. One of my closest friends and I – let’s refer to her as BFF – love sending each other dog and cat videos. But ever since we lost Zoey, our pet dog, who was only six years old, to acute kidney failure, a lot of dog videos tend to make me sad. Although, I still love watching and sharing them as much as before. But to fill the void left by Zoey’s absence, I’ve begun to feed a murder of crows post lunch every day. It’s something my mother used to do before she adopted Zoey. And funnily enough, the only person I know who feeds crows is my BFF, in-fact, she even has a favourite crow, a special privilege I am yet to forge with any of the winged visitors that come to our balcony for free food. It’s a very covert operation for me, I quietly slip a plate on the balcony and immediately leave.

Since we are punctual around our house when it comes to meals, lunch is almost always at 1 pm. The crows start cawing and hankering for food by 1.30 pm if the royal highnesses haven’t been served by then. But they don’t just eat anything, for example, they have no interest in plain rice and dal, it needs to come with chicken or fish bones. So, there are days when I have nothing to give them and if I serves them a little leftover curry or just rice, they usually don’t eat it. It’s only recently that I realised that the little buggers haven’t just learned the time at which they can anticipate a plate of free serving but they’ve also associate me as their waitress. Or maybe calling myself Demeter sounds nicer – she is the Greek Goddess of Grain. Anyway… Yesterday, the murder came cawing at 1.30 pm and then dispersed with disappointment, because there was nothing to give them. At least nothing that they would’ve eaten. About 45 minutes later, I just went out to the balcony to soak in some winter sun, and one little crow let out a shriek and immediately I was surrounded by a dozen of them. For a second, I freaked out, then laughed at their acknowledgement – WHERE IS OUR FREE FOOD WOMAN? That’s probably what they were trying to ask me. Or maybe just “GIVE US FOOD, USELESS HUMAN”. Who knows.

I immediately video-called BFF to show the crows that had gathered and say “dude, they recognize me!”. But half the birds were already gone by then. Regardless, we started an excited discussion on our unlikely bond with murders. (That sounds so much cooler, so…)

BFF: These guys are very specific when it comes to what they eat okay. They don’t like anything yellow.

Me: Really? I was about to give them fried banana curry, that’s what we for lunch today, then decided against it. They probably wouldn’t have had it.

BFF: They hate chapatis.  

Me: Is it! My crows love rotis. We always keep an extra roti or two aside just to give it to the crows. Wait, I can’t believe I just said, “my crows love rotis”. Hahaha!

BFF: Imagine if someone overhears our conversation, they’ll probably think we are discussing kids and when they realise we are talking about crows, they’ll go WTF.

Both of us literally chorused “WTF” together and broke into peals of laughter.

I mean, of all the random things in the world, who would’ve thought that my closest friend and I would co-incidentally share a weird love for crows too.

Birds spotted where I live Birds spotted where I live

This year has been such a tough one for so many reasons, that these little fun conversations are often the highlight of my day. Casual birding has also become a new therapeutic hobby for me and whenever I spot a new bird in our generously green locality, I always send a photo to BFF and my partner/boyfriend/husband (same person, not three different people). They’re both enthusiastic in their responses to my photos, although a beloved aunt of mine thinks birdwatching is my newfound eccentricity. 

Well, as a new year dawns, I hope you find a new hobby too, however weird, and hopefully you already have an amazing BFF like mine to share all your eccentricities with.