Change is easier if you stay curious

My grandmother died Wednesday. She was 95 and brilliant. She traveled the world and brought back ideas – instead of souvenirs – for the kids she taught in her English and Social Studies classes in the 432-person farm-town where she lived and worked.

I’m already missing her. But, she was always so curious and interested in everything that I can’t help but think, that she’s approaching this transition the same way – with acceptance and interest.

Many of us don’t do that. We shy away from transition. Deny the changes. Hide from the uncertainties. We don’t like to say goodbye to what we know for the uncertainty of something new.

Often, that fear or discomfort keeps us from maximizing our life experience. We never apply for our dream job because we’re afraid we might fail. We don’t go back to school, or get the divorce, or tell the guy that we love him, because we are afraid of what comes next. We don’t talk about death or stay close to our dying loved ones because we are afraid too, of not knowing what will happen or how we’ll cope.

Yet, life changes anyhow. These things happen – anyhow. The sun always sets, before rising again. You can either accept this,  participate and live and learn and move, or you can stay stuck in denial and rooted in the status quo.

By refusing to fully experience all the transitions of life – even death — by resisting change, you only suffer more losses. You miss out on pivotal experiences that can shape and inspire you. You miss out on a chance to engage fully in all of life.

No transition is easy, but if you’re paying attention there is great meaning and wisdom that comes by becoming present to any life change. There is great insight that comes when you experience any change in the present — moment by moment – with great wonder and curiosity.

I am better because of what my Grandmother taught and shared with me during her life. And she continued to teach me as I sat with her in those final days. She reminded me not to be afraid of changes in life, instead to embrace them, to experience them and to live with faith and love that it is all just as it must be. She reminded me to go boldly. She lived that way. And, I’m certain that her energy carries on.