Dare to Reflect: From Hole to Whole

Hey, remember New Year's Day? When you decided to drastically overhaul your life overnight, from your cardio aversion to your Real Housewives habit? If you're anything like 99% of us, you've likely been back on reality TV for about four months now, cheerfully explaining away missed workouts but secretly suspecting you must be some kind of weak and inefficient subspecies of human being. Symbolic beginnings can prove a useful impetus for change, but falling short of our own unrealistic expectations fills our minds with doubt, keeping our bodies stuck on repeat. Today - Thursday, April 26 - consider the following:

There's a Hole in My Sidewalk
By Portia Nelson

I.
I walk down the street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I fall in.
I am lost…
I am helpless.
It is not my fault.
It takes forever to find my way out.

II.
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I pretend I don’t see it.
I fall in.
I can’t believe I am in the same place.
But it isn’t my fault.
It still takes a long time to get out.

III.
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I see it there.
I still fall in…It’s a habit.
My eyes are open.
I know where I am.
It is my fault.
I get out immediately.

IV.
I walk down the same street.
There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.
I walk around it.

V.
I walk down another street.

Portia Nelson's poem has been called "an autobiography in five short chapters," and you may find it helpful to keep in mind that the type of growth she describes takes place over a lifetime. We can't expect ourselves to transform instantly, particularly when we're wrestling with deeply engrained habits and emotions—all we can do is keep taking the next right action, trusting despite setbacks that we have both the strength and the stamina to evolve. Various aspects of our lives exist in different chapters from moment to moment, and we shouldn't allow big dreams to keep us from celebrating small victories. Today, make peace with your holey sidewalk, knowing that you - right now, just as you are - are whole and enough.

—Emma Aubry Roberts