Queer Spaces

A performer friend of Grey's and mine is doing a show tonight. I wanted to go when I thought it was at a gay bar, but now that it turns out to be at a rock club, I'm not nearly as enthusiastic. Our friend is a wonderful performer, but I'm just not very interested in spending time in predominantly straight spaces right now. I feel like I've been shoehorned (and shoehorned myself) into them for most of my life, and have also felt (perhaps needlessly) out of place in queer spaces. Now that I feel more comfortable in the latter, that's where I want to spend most of my social time, which I have to ration for health and financial reasons. It's nothing against straight people themselves, and I certainly don't want to abandon or avoid my straight friends; it's more that when I have the energy to go out, I want to be in what now feels like my space. I tried to explain this to my mom and it came out sounding stilted and prejudice-y. Does it make any sense?

[ETA: Trans readers will know this, but others may not: It also has to do with having to go to the bathroom. In the past two years, I have come to hate bigendered public restrooms in all venues, but at a gay bar, the worst that's likely to happen to me in the men's room is a snarky comment. At a rock club in the Warehouse District, how the hell am I supposed to know what's going to happen? I don't want to have to kill anybody.]