10 Years of Hating, Jealously

You might not believe this. I know that I certainly don’t. But April 18th, 2022 is the TENTH BIRTHDAY OF THE JEALOUS HATERS BOOK CLUB.

Our very first installment, way back before the club had a name, 50 Shades of Grey, chapter one, or why Ana is the shittiest friend ever, debuted to what I assumed would be an extremely limited audience. My career was stalled; I had nothing left to lose and nothing else going on. But within less than twenty-four hours of that first post, the recaps were on their way to becoming viral. The second recap, posted a day after the first one, already featured a fan art contribution. By the eighth recap, I was receiving hate mail and all sort of unhinged accusations from two different authors’ fan armies. And by the time I finished the book in June of that year (remember, when my output was much faster?), my blog had received more visitors than the annual total of the Space Needle.

The Jealous Hater Book Club put me on the map and allowed me to branch out with viral essays and tv appearances about other subjects. My bone-deep hatred of Fifty Shades of Grey led to one of my biggest literary successes in The Boss, a series of erotic fiction that has sold over a million copies, was published in more languages than I kept track of, and has found a new audience—and twenty-four million views—on the Radish app. Most recently, Jealous Haters Book Club spawned a private Patreon club, Jealous Patrons Book Club, in which I continue to skewer books that are, frankly, total ass. Jealous Haters Book Club has changed my life, brought so many of you cool people into it, and I’m freaking shocked that it’s all lasted this long.

And of course, this special anniversary happens on a fucking Monday.

So, like a kid whose birthday falls on a Wednesday, the party is happening on Saturday. Drop by YouTube Live on April 23, 2:00 pm to ???? (until question marks means the party’s really gonna be rocking) for a live reading of the original recaps (full disclosure? I have not read them since ten years ago), chit-chat, gossip, and cake.

You can’t have cake, though. Because the internet hasn’t evolved to the point that I could share it with you. But Mr. Jen FOOLISHLY said, “You can’t eat a whole sheet cake by yourself.” So obviously, I’m gonna try to eat a whole sheet cake by myself live on the internet.

If you can’t stop by, then allow me to express my heartfelt thanks to you right now: if you came to the recaps late, thanks for coming. If you were here from day one, thanks for spreading the word and making my Fifty Shades of Grey recaps bigger than I ever intended them to be. And to everyone who came for those recaps and stayed to make fun of books from the problematic to the just boring, thanks for sticking around.

I honestly cannot thank Trout Nation enough. All I did was write the recaps. You all made the community. I’m just lucky to be the weirdo at the center of it.