Who do you hold in your heart?
Sad news continues to swirl among the happy these days. Up and down, up and down. I was thinking about this yesterday during a meeting, as I held a sweet baby who was oblivious to the healing power he was having on my heart.
On Friday, I went shopping to try to find some new clothes to wear to various upcoming events. With each store, I left empty-handed, I was getting more and more frustrated. Finally, I found a cute dress at J. Crew. It was an outlet store so the price was cheap and I decided to give it a try. I never know what size I am so I took two and, perhaps a bit too optimistically, tried on the smaller size first. Once on, I realized the dress wasn't me at all. The skirt flared out way too flamboyantly for quiet me. So, I lifted it up to take it off... And got stuck. Oh. Yes. So. Stuck. I could NOT get it off! Standing in front of the mirror with the fabric all bunched up around my chest, my hideous underwear and saggy socks on display I thought, "When I have to ask the fitting room lady to help me, she is going to have the best story of the year to tell all her friends." And then I thought, "No, I am going to have the best story of the year."
But I must say at that moment, I was pretty sure I didn't want it.
I took some deep breaths. I tried pulling it up again. No good. I tried pulling it down over my shoulders. No good. I could feel my face starting to prickle. I averted my eyes from my lumpy out-of-shape body. I tried another tug and felt like I might have pulled a muscle in my shoulder. I breathed again. Leave it to me to get stuck in a dress AND injure myself.
Finally, when I thought all hope was lost, I grabbed the fabric for one more desperate pull and discovered...
A zipper.
I was saved.
As I left the store triumphantly, I thought of my dear, dear friend and how much she would enjoy that story. I have some pretty stationery and I could send her a real letter. She'd like that.
But when I returned home, I received a note I have been dreading for months. She has entered a hospice care facility. I sat there staring at her good-bye message, beautifully and courageously worded, and cried. I cried for my friend, who is so brave. And for all of us who have been touched by this wonderful woman. We will miss her so.
I am so grateful to my friend, my mentor, who taught me to look for the story in all of life's predicaments. To find the humor. To embrace the silly, embarrassing moments, especially when they involve underwear or mismatched socks.
And to find the beauty and love, too, in small gifts. In holding a baby. A little miracle. A little promise. That life goes on whether we're ready or not.
And that love doesn't die.
I feel my friend's light and I see it in all the people she has touched and inspired. And in all the children who have read her beautiful, hopeful stories.
She is in my heart. And in so many others.
Always.
~*~*~*~*~*~
Monday Morning Warm-Up:
Who are you holding in your heart today?
On Friday, I went shopping to try to find some new clothes to wear to various upcoming events. With each store, I left empty-handed, I was getting more and more frustrated. Finally, I found a cute dress at J. Crew. It was an outlet store so the price was cheap and I decided to give it a try. I never know what size I am so I took two and, perhaps a bit too optimistically, tried on the smaller size first. Once on, I realized the dress wasn't me at all. The skirt flared out way too flamboyantly for quiet me. So, I lifted it up to take it off... And got stuck. Oh. Yes. So. Stuck. I could NOT get it off! Standing in front of the mirror with the fabric all bunched up around my chest, my hideous underwear and saggy socks on display I thought, "When I have to ask the fitting room lady to help me, she is going to have the best story of the year to tell all her friends." And then I thought, "No, I am going to have the best story of the year."
But I must say at that moment, I was pretty sure I didn't want it.
I took some deep breaths. I tried pulling it up again. No good. I tried pulling it down over my shoulders. No good. I could feel my face starting to prickle. I averted my eyes from my lumpy out-of-shape body. I tried another tug and felt like I might have pulled a muscle in my shoulder. I breathed again. Leave it to me to get stuck in a dress AND injure myself.
Finally, when I thought all hope was lost, I grabbed the fabric for one more desperate pull and discovered...
A zipper.
I was saved.
As I left the store triumphantly, I thought of my dear, dear friend and how much she would enjoy that story. I have some pretty stationery and I could send her a real letter. She'd like that.
But when I returned home, I received a note I have been dreading for months. She has entered a hospice care facility. I sat there staring at her good-bye message, beautifully and courageously worded, and cried. I cried for my friend, who is so brave. And for all of us who have been touched by this wonderful woman. We will miss her so.
I am so grateful to my friend, my mentor, who taught me to look for the story in all of life's predicaments. To find the humor. To embrace the silly, embarrassing moments, especially when they involve underwear or mismatched socks.
And to find the beauty and love, too, in small gifts. In holding a baby. A little miracle. A little promise. That life goes on whether we're ready or not.
And that love doesn't die.
I feel my friend's light and I see it in all the people she has touched and inspired. And in all the children who have read her beautiful, hopeful stories.
She is in my heart. And in so many others.
Always.
~*~*~*~*~*~
Monday Morning Warm-Up:
Who are you holding in your heart today?
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