Lighting a fire

My family has been heating our house at least partially with wood heat for the last several years. One season, I had just finished building a house, and we didn't have enough money for a heating system, but I did have a big wood stove with the cold air return for our air conditioner just behind it. It was the coldest winter on record in that part of Missouri--down to 20 below on some nights.
I had to keep that fire going. I remember several mornings, I got up, groaned because the house was so cold, went out to the wood pile, knocked snow off the wood, split it and brought it in to build the fire. You would have thought I would be an expert on fire building.
But I'm not. Most of the time, it takes at least three tries before I get the fire going. My wife, (somewhat to my embarrassment because even though it isn't written down anywhere it feels like part of the manly man's code that the man of the family needs to be the best fire builder) is better at starting fires than I am. I light the match, get my paper going, and for some reason, it suddenly decides it's fireproof or something.
Very strange. Interestingly enough, I am finding my current task, trying to get people interested in my book, (and once there's a demand, I have 15 others I can put out there) much like building fires. I read all the recommendations on the Internet, I jump through the hoops, and I find my paper either wet, fireproof or just not enough. The only thing that comforts me about this analogy is that eventually, after several miscues, I do get my fire going...