8 Myths That Rule Overworked Lives (Especially When at Home) and the Truth That Will Set You Free
Young beautiful woman relaxing in hammock in a tropical resort.back view
Chances are you’re reading this because you’re just too damn busy. Life seems to be exploding out of your ears if you’re an extremely busy person. And yet … there has to be a better way, right? And there is. It’s all about a key change in your perspective.
Here are a few myths that drive the speeding bus of overwork in our heads … and the refreshing truths that help erase them.
Myth #1: I am the only one who can fix/do/solve this thing.
TRUTH: Every problem that comes along is not yours to solve. Others may even do some tasks better than you, helping you get the results you want. When we concern ourselves with the most important things, and assume a right-sized sense of responsibility, life eases up remarkably. What can you let go of that isn’t yours to resolve?
Myth #2: Self-Care is the last thing I have time for.
TRUTH: Those seemingly unimportant acts of self-care are what actually help you get the job done. For real. It’s what greases the wheel of productivity, and powers up your personal engine. Then you can show up in much greater equanimity and balance, ready to accomplish great things.
Myth #3: Everyone is depending on me.
TRUTH: A majority of women feel they must put others first, at the expense of their own well-being. But when you’re the last one on your priority list, and you feel guilty taking time for yourself, you actually cause yourself harm. You DO need time for you. It’s a fact. And it’s perfectly fine to disappoint others. In fact, you may assume others expect results from you that aren’t even on their mind.
Myth #4: Forget meeting my needs … it’s not going to happen.
TRUTH: We all deserve to have our needs met. That is a fact of life. Take a good hard look at those unmet needs of yours. Are you advocating for yourself? Is another person actively preventing you from getting them met? That would be a serious red flag that needs your attention. Sometimes our circumstances are tough, and we must cope, especially in an emergency. Yet, a chronic ongoing problem demands real and lasting change.
Myth #5: Good results mean crushing it with hard work.
TRUTH: Working hard is all well and good … except when it costs you dearly. What if you worked smarter instead of harder? Did you know you can have an 80% increase in overall productivity by simply taking a vacation, or even a staycation? The key to getting great results is to rebalance your system, marshal your energy, and then use it to greatest effect. Which is not always about slaving away and ‘putting in the hours’. If you have an empty feeling at the end of the day, this applies to you.
Myth #6: Forget ‘just fine’—only excellence counts.
TRUTH: In the larger scheme of things, who’s going to remember if your reports were all turned in with every detail letter perfect? Or if your house looks a little trampled most of the time? Perfectionism is not the goal, friend. Balance is. And sometimes that means we put in a little less effort. So yes, you may buy cupcakes instead of bake them from scratch for a birthday party, especially if that give you an extra hour to focus on meeting your own needs. No one is standing around judging you … except possibly yourself.
Myth #7: It’s wrong to ask for help.
TRUTH: This is simply not true. Not only is it perfectly acceptable to ask for help, it’s a lovely invitation to the rest of the world. By allowing others in to help, strangers, friends, and yes, even your children, can do something they may genuinely love. They get to step up and contribute. This is true whether the help required is making lunch, organizing a conference, or listening to you pour out your worries. When stuck at home, help can be found in online support groups of all kinds, or even at the end of a phone line. Have you made a call to someone you love and trust lately? Who could you ask for help?
Myth #8: I’m the one exception here because I’m just so flawed.
TRUTH: If you have any flaw, it is probably that you are too hard on yourself. As ‘very busy people’ we exist in a hyped up state of doing all the time. We believe if we stop for even one minute, everything will collapse. And then we’ll be discovered as the imposters that we secretly are. This is where our thinking must change in order to live a life of balance.
In fact, you are worthy of self-care and self-love, friend. We all are. And you do deserve to stop running in place, to get support and find all the comfort and joy you need.
If you do, the world will not stop turning, and those who love you will keep on loving you. All you have to do is stop and get grounded again, no matter where you are. This is the profound gift of self-care—it will always put you right again. And so you can give once more, in a whole and balanced way that truly works.
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