Love Doesn't Cost A Thing

The man who loves me knows better than to bring me roses on Valentine's Day.  It's not that I hate the holiday; the whole thing leaves me feeling rather blase'.  It's so cliche'!  Valentines are love letters, but our kids hand them out to each other and to us, their parents, because they're told to.  Hearts, flowers, candy, heart-shaped balloons--somehow, being told "I love you" on a specified day rings rather hollow.  For the recently brokenhearted, it only serves to re-open a wound.  What's the point?



Most people know the history of the day.  At least, you know the basics.  As the story goes, Roman emperor, Claudius II, forbid marriages in order to get men to join his army.  He believed that the reason men wouldn't join was that they didn't want to leave their families.  Father Valentine continued to wed people in secret until he was caught and jailed.  In jail, it is thought, he found a love of his own and, just before he was put to death, he sent her a love note signed "your Valentine."  The Catholic church recognizes three martyred saints as "Valentine" or "Valentinus."  Which one gets the credit for the holiday is a mystery.  I'd be remiss if I didn't point out that there could also be a pagan fertility festival, Lupercalia, which predates Valentine's Day.  Since Lupercalia was a somewhat brutal celebration, its ties to the celebration of lovers seems rather flimsy, however.  Most people couldn't care less about the foundation of the holiday anyway.



If you really want to show your love today, do something that reflects the two of you as a couple.  If you're in love, you have history:  a first meeting, a first date, fantasies, foibles, and private jokes.  You share secrets that make you smile and things that are unique to the two of you. 

Write "I love you" in the sand or snow.  If you don't usually say those words, use the words you do say.  
Re-create the scene from your first date or your favorite couple movie.  
Make it a date night with a theme--eat the same food the lovers eat in the movie or get Asian takeout and watch an Asian movie.  
Bring her a bouquet of Tootsie Pops because you know she loves them.  
Hide a gift, geocaching-style, if that's an activity the two of you share.  
Take your video game elf to an archery range to practice his marksmanship or sit on the couch and play a game together.  
Celebrate that you have each other by honoring what's special about your unique relationship.  No one knows him or her like you do.  Give your significant other a gift that only you can give.  There's a reason they're referred to as your "significant other," after all. 

Your Turn:

What is the best Valentine's Day or anniversary gift you've ever gotten?  Why was it special to you?