BOOK REVIEW: Rules for Being a Girl, by Candace Bushnell and Katie Cotugno ~ The Best Feminist Book I’ve Read So Far This Year *SPOILERS & DISCUSSION*
“Remember, girl: It’s the best time in the history of the world to be you. You can do anything! You can do everything! You can be whatever you want to be!
Just as long as you follow the rules.”
~ Rules for Being a Girl, by Candace Bushnell and Katie Cotugno
Have you ever felt this incredible sensation when you realise that the timing is absolutely perfect for you to make a certain decision, go for a walk or even read a book?
That’s exactly how I felt when I got Rules for Being a Girl last week, by one of my absolute favourite Greek publishing houses, Psichogios Publications. It was love at first sight and I knew this would be one of those 5-star reads that you think about, long after you’ve finished the book. In all honesty, that’s exactly what happened. Because even though it’s been four days since I finished this amazing novel, I still catch myself thinking how empowering, motivating and bold this book was.
“It starts before you can even remember: You learn the rules for being a girl. . .
Marin has always been good at navigating these unspoken guidelines. A star student and editor of the school paper, she dreams of getting into Brown University. Marin’s future seems bright―and her young, charismatic English teacher, Mr. Beckett, is always quick to admire her writing and talk books with her.
But when “Bex” takes things too far and comes on to Marin, she’s shocked and horrified. Had she somehow led him on? Was it her fault?
When Marin works up the courage to tell the administration what happened, no one believes her. She’s forced to face Bex in class every day. Except now, he has an ax to grind.
But Marin isn’t about to back down. She uses the school newspaper to fight back and she starts a feminist book club at school. She finds allies in the most unexpected people, like “slutty” Gray Kendall, who she’d always dismissed as just another lacrosse bro. As things heat up at school and in her personal life, Marin must figure out how to take back the power and write her own rules.”
Since it’s been a while since the last time I wrote a spoilery review, let me remind you that, once again, there will be two sections in this post. The first part will be the non-spoiler part, where I’ll mostly talk about the technicalities of the book, how the plot and the characters, the descriptions and the narration were in general. The second part will be about some more spoilery things, which, if you haven’t read the book, I’ll warn you, so you can skip that part and come back, once you’ve read the book, so we can discuss it in more depth.
With all that being said, let’s get to the actual review.
To begin with, I had really great expectations since the day I found out about this book. I knew it would be terrifying to read about a similar situation with the one I had to endure back in 2012. I also knew though that it would be empowering and inspiring and 100% motivating.
I wasn’t wrong!
Rules for Being a Girl was exactly the perfect read for me right now.
It reminded me that we should raise our voices for what we believe in. It reminded me that we should fight for what’s right. It reminded me that “right” and “easy” are two very different things, and thankfully Marin chose to do the former.
I absolutely adored how quick the pacing was and how I could effortlessly connect with the characters (some of whom I could be friends with and some of whom were so freaking toxic that I wouldn’t want them to be near me, not in a million years).
I really liked that the protagonist moved from shock to denial, to acceptance and then to action. I loved the fact that she tried to fight for injustice and she realised that things aren’t always what they seem to be, and we shouldn’t make assumptions or jump to conclusions just because a certain someone seems to act a certain way.
Not only that but, aside from some cliché characters, about whom I’ll talk in more detail in the spoilery section, I liked that there was diversity and a lot of representation in the secondary characters, as well. It made the book and the story itself feel more real, and I enjoyed how there were black characters and gay characters, characters who played jazz and characters who had ADHD.
That is because, not everyone is white, straight and with no mental health issues. Everyone should feel included and accepted.
“It’s like now that I’m looking for inequality, I’m seeing it everywhere, categorizing a thousand great and small unfairnesses everywhere I go. Why didn’t I really see this before?”
~ Rules for Being a Girl, by Candace Bushnell and Katie Cotugno
*DISCLAIMER. FROM THIS POINT ONWARDS, THE REVIEW WILL CONTAIN SPOILERS. IF YOU HAVEN’T READ THE BOOK YET AND YOU DON’T WANT TO BE SPOILED, PLEASE STOP READING.*Moving on to the spoilery section of this review, I want to focus on two characters in particular; Chloe and Bex.
At the beginning of the book, when I realised that Chloe was Greek, I was like “Wow, that’s so cool! I’ll be able to connect a bit with that character.” and this made me even more eager to see how she was as a friend. Yet, straight from the very first pages, it was obvious to me that this girl was toxic.
I’ll tell you why.
To me, Chloe seemed like the bimbo friend, who always wants to be perfect and always wants the best for you, just as long as you’re not as perfect as she is and you don’t get exactly the best, just as she does.
Just please… Tell me I’m not an island and you’ve come across people like that in your life. Otherwise I may cry!
I know that teenagers can be cruel but she was supposed to be Marin’s BEST FRIEND. She supposed to be there for her, no matter what. She was supposed to be the person who knew Marin her ENTIRE life. And yet…
When Marin told her what had happened at Bex’s house, Chloe didn’t believe her. Instead, she started questioning Marin, making her second-guess whether or not what had happened was just her imagination.
Newsflash! It was a sexual harassment from an adult to a MINOR, through and through! And before you read too much into this, it would be exactly the same if Marin was 19, 25 or 50! It would be just as sick and perverted!
And this, leads me to the second person I want to talk about; Bex.
You’ve seen people like him. Charismatic, funny, seemingly smart and quite handsome. And you just want to believe that they want what’s best for you. But when a person like that tries to kiss you without your consent, then they are not charismatic, funny, smart or handsome at all! They’re simply sick. And you need to report them ASAP, when they have authority and you’re just a High School student, as Marin was.
This was Marin’s first mistake, if you ask me. She should’ve spoken straight from the beginning. She should’ve raised her voice sooner. Yet, it’s hard to do so, when your supposed-to-be bestie doesn’t believe you because she thinks she has a relationship with that same teacher! 
It’s hard to do so when your toxic, sexist boyfriend makes fun of you and says you make out with teachers, in front of the entire school.
It’s hard to do so when the director of the school doesn’t investigate the matter more and simply believes what the teacher in question told him.
These where the things that truly drove me mad, along with the fact that, towards the end of the book, when Chloe told to Marin the entire truth, Marin forgave her so easily. I’m not saying she shouldn’t. It’s just that, Chloe’s situation with Bex was different, or at least the authors made it seem as such.
It also bugged me the fact that none of the girls pressed charges and Bex was simply thrown out of school. I mean, seriously? I needed something… I don’t know. Something more for the catharsis to come.
“Be flirty but not too flirty. Be confident but not aggressive. Be funny but in a low-key, quiet way. Eat cheeseburgers, but don’t get fat. Be chill, but don’t lose control.”
~ Rules for Being a Girl, by Candace Bushnell and Katie Cotugno
Still, these are simply details and they don’t make me love the book any less.
Overall, I ended up rating the book with 5 out of 5 stars, and I honestly think that you guys should read it if you haven’t done so already. I honestly thin young adults should read this book. I do believe we should all talk about the traumatising things we had to face in our lives.
No one is alone. #MeToo had to face harassment and assault. But I’m here now. So is Marin. So are all those brave, inspiring women and men, that plucked up the courage and took back the power their abusers had stolen from them.
Thank you all so very much for stopping by once again. It truly means the world to me and I want you to know that I most certainly don’t take your presence here for granted.
Let me know in the comment section down below if you have any other feminist books to recommend to me.
Hope you have a wonderful day, dearies, you stay safe and positive.
Till next time… Toodles! 
