Wake Up Call: How Will You Look Back on Your Life?

Recently in our Self-Care Group for Extremely Busy Women on Facebook, a woman who is dying of cancer shared that she had finally learned the importance of self-care after a very hard life. ‘Eat the chocolate’ she said. And don’t put up with abuse. Kind of makes you want to look at your own life, doesn’t it?

This post (which as of this writing) had gotten more than 800 comments and had been seen by more than 20,000 woman struck us all to the bone. What a rare, precious thing it is to hear from a courageous person with true perspective.

Cause here’s the thing: we forget we are in charge of our lives.

We forget that when we’re annoyed with someone, we’re the ones who carry that burden, hour after hour, day after day.

We miss the fact that we keep staying late at work ‘just one more night’ while our kids are at home missing us and sinking ever deeper into their screens. We forget that moving our bodies and maintaining our health really IS critical to our happiness.

And we lose track of ourselves profoundly. We simply don’t bother with ephemerals like self-care because, hey, who has the time? Or so we tell ourselves….

The truth is that we do have the time. Because we are the ones who decide how to use that time. We choose where to put our energies and attention, and in whom to invest our precious love and work.

We try not to notice whether we get back much less than we give. Or we notice, grow resentful and then just stay there, parked in our anger.

It’s much easier to maintain the status quo, no matter how noxious, than it is to make the changes that will truly serve our lives. Or so we tell ourselves. That can be downright scary, right?

But, oh my friends, it is so worth it to make the changes that truly serve you in the long run.

As busy women, we’re always trying to reconcile that age-old urge to mother the world with our needs in the here and now. But honestly, friend, we can’t be all things to all people… we just can’t. So why even try?

Instead, why not get comfortable finally taking time for yourself? Go sit in a long hot bath and luxuriate with your own thoughts. Let the dishes pile up—or better yet, let someone else (the kids, perhaps?) do them.

Give yourself permission to stare out the window and do nothing. Dare to take a vacation, and consider going alone. Make time for those you love, but only the ones who love you right back. Ask for help when and where you need it.

If it seems impossible to do any of this, then begin at the beginning. This is actually why I put the worksheets in my book The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care. Because when we’re too busy, our thoughts congeal into one untenable blob that threatens to overwhelm us.

By taking them apart, one precious step at a time, we can finally wake up and tell the truth about our lives and our needs.

Only then can we build lives of self-care that truly feed our souls.

Need some inspiration for the journey? Read the book, The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care, and make time for those worksheets and questionnaires. Do the journaling exercises, and take as long as you want to listen to YOU.

Then drop by our Self-Care Group for Extremely Busy Women and join us. Learn from these amazing women—56,000 strong—who are creating a truly safe haven of love and support every single day. And lean on them when you need some love or guidance. Believe me, just being there feels healing.

Love to you wherever you are on your self-care journey!

Thanks for bringing me along.

 

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