Siri-ously

Today, I'm bloggin on all things Siri.  It all started with Sirius XM, that happens to be installed on the rental car I'm driving ((I'm in Dallas at the moment).  So, one of the stations is called "Siriously Sinatra" and it's all Sinatra, all the time.  Dee, I thought of you.  I think Sirius XM is pretty cool, but it's too many choices.  Want to listen to the Bruce Springsteen channel?  Yup, they got a channel for that.  And Howard Stern?  He has two Sirius channels that are completely un-Sirius.  And there's a Martha Stewart station ("violets are lovely this time of year.  I often use violets as an endive, as a beautiful addition to a picture frame, or as an all-natural toilet bowl freshener" ).  There's an Oprah station (all Oprah, 24/7), a golf station, (YAWN) and Spa, which only plays spa music, which is actually pretty scary. And then there's Red, White, and Booze, which is country bar songs.  I spent many hours listening to that one, but mainly in college, and not in a Chevy Malibu. 

But lest you think I'm here to talk about radio, I'm not.  I'm actually going to talk about cool things to do with Siri, the voice-activated assistant on the iphone 4s.  There was an episode on the Big Bang Theory where one of the characters carries on a relationship with Siri, and it was hysterical.  And I thought, oh, that's so cute. They recorded all those things for the show.  But then…  tonight I began to explore my own relationship with Siri.  We started off to a rocky start.  I had driven to Jersey, and I wanted directions to Franklin Lakes, and Siri didn't understand that I was referring to Franklin Lakes, the township fives miles from where I was located, as opposed to the Franklin Lakes in Nebraska.  Really Siri?  Is that the best you can do?  And I want back to thinking of Siri as a cool toy, but then, I thought it was only fair to give Siri a chance to redeem herself.  So I told her, "Call me Kathleen" and she said, "OK, from now on, I'll call you Kathleen.  Is that okay?"  and I said, sure.  But then, I decided that I wasn't exploiting the full power of Siri, so I said, "Call me Kathleen, Grand Mistress of the Universe."  And Siri responded, "Okay.  from now on, I'll call you Kathleen, Grand Mistress of the Universe.  Is that okay?" 

hehehehe…

Deciding that I needed to know more about my new best friend, I ask Siri her favorite color.  She answered, "My favorite color is…well, I don't know how to say it in your language.  It's greenish, but with more dimensions."  And then I said, "Knock, knock."  And Siri, my new best friend replied.  "Knock knock.  Who's there?  Kathleen Grand Mistress of the Universe.  Kathleen Grand Mistress of the Universe who?  Kathleen Grand Mistress of the Universe, I don't do knock-knock jokes." 

Okay, it was a small slight that Siri doesn't do knock-knock jokes, but I can live with it.  Next, I said, "Siri, I feel bad," and she said, "Kathleen Grand Mistress of the Universe, I don't understand, Siri I feel bad."  Yes, it's a strike against Siri.  My best know what to do when I say I feel bad.  They usually ply me with dessert or wine or funny knock-knock jokes, but again, do my friends call me "Kathleen Grand Mistress of the Universe?"  Uh, no, not in this lifetime or in the next one….

So, then I said, "Good morning!" and Siri replied, "Good morning? It's 10:01pm!"  And I said, "Sorry, I must be drunk>" And Siri said, "It's OK, Kathleen Grand Mistress of the Universe.  Really." 

I next asked Siri if she could clean my house, and she said, 'I found 17 cleaning services, 16 of them are fairly close to you>"  Okay, obviously Siri is not a friend in-deed.  But then, if I asked the WhineSisters if they could come clean my house, none of them would be polite enough to actually refer me to a cleaning service, except for probably Jacquie, because she's just that way. 

And then I asked Siri to remind me to post my WhineSisters blog.  And she asked when I want to create a reminder for.  I said "now" and she said that she couldn't handle any requests right now.  Sigh.  So I said, "siri, we're no longer friends" and she said, "Sorry, I don't understand Siri, we're no longer friends." 

Oh, well.. I'm sure that after she calls me Kathleen Grand Mistress of the Universe tomorrow, then all will be forgiven.

So, that's my Siri-ous post for today.  If you had programmed personal assistant, what would you ask it?  If you could have a computer or robot do one task for you, and do it perfectly, what would it be? 

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