Celebrating Christmas Your Way Part 2
Last week, we introduced the idea of incorporating knowledge of your sacred pathway to increase your celebration and worship during the Christmas season. We talked about naturalists, sensates, and traditionalists. If you missed that post, you can read it HERE.
This week we’re going to look at three more pathways and how these believers can make the most of this Christmas season: ascetics, activists, and caregivers.
Ascetics
Ascetic believers are those who make us think of monks and nuns. They like to get away and be alone for their most intense worship, they tend to be strict in their life and practice, and they usually prefer austerity over ornamentation, all of which means they are likely to wake up before (or stay up later than) anyone else so that they can worship in private. The fact that it gets darker sooner and stays darker longer is a plus for ascetics, as the dark is the perfect backdrop for ascetics to get lost in the interior form of worship that they prefer.
Unlike a sensate, if you’re an ascetic you’re probably not going to be moved by a glitzy display of lights and decorations. You prefer a comfortable quiet place where you won’t be distracted or disturbed. I’ve been known, when sharing a hotel room with my wife, to scope out the nooks and crannies of a hotel to find a place in the morning to get away for a little bit. As your family decorates the house, let them know you’d like one little corner to be free of distracting sights, sounds, or smells.
One of the favored acts of ascetics include night watches. If you’re not an ascetic, you probably don’t get it. M. Basil Pennington points out that “the value and effect of watching can only be known by experience.” This is the season above all others to enjoy night watches. For some reason I don’t fully understand, the night just seems holier during advent. I don’t know why and I can’t defend that thought, but to me, it certainly feels that way.
Another practice for ascetics is being still (silent). You need the quiet and you get spiritually “tired” if you’re always conversing, especially if it’s small talk. If you’re spending time with the extended family (not as likely this year, I guess) you’re probably going to have to get away for a bit. If you’re married to an ascetic, make this as easy as possible for your spouse. The family doesn’t have to be together twenty-four hours a day to be an intimate family. Give your loved one permission and even encouragement to get spiritually charged up by getting into a quiet place where they don’t have to talk for a bit.
Fasting is going to be difficult in this season, especially during a family celebration, but you can practice obedience, another favored practice of ascetics. Let your “gift” to Jesus be an act of surrendering something you’ve been stubbornly holding onto that you know isn’t pleasing or glorifying to God. Mentally wrap it, present it to your Savior, and walk in the intimacy that follows.
Activists
The challenge for activists is that the family celebration time on Christmas day may feel a little bit like an interruption to what “really matters,” which is why your activist family member will be the first to suggest you spend Christmas afternoon at a soup kitchen or passing out warm blankets to the homeless (which aren’t entirely bad ideas).
Your presents to others may include gifts to international development ministries in their names or books on current topics. Just be aware that giving White Fragility to anyone who watches Tucker Carlson probably isn’t going to end well. Don’t let your activism break apart what is supposed to be a time of family togetherness and celebration. Most people will crave a break from a raucous year of activism and news packed with controversial debates. If you think it’s important to give a provocative book to a relative, wait until New Year’s. There’s no law that says you can’t give gifts after Christmas. Don’t let your activism spoil the day for others.
For you, your greatest excitement is probably going to come from what happens before and after Christmas day. Perhaps you’ll be a lead person to bring food and toys to disadvantaged communities, such as the program sponsored by Second Baptist Church in Houston, Texas called Angels of Light.
To stay grounded, re-read passages of Scripture that speak of Christ’s coming into the world as a promise of setting things right, such as Luke 14:66ff:
“He went to Nazareth, where he had been brought up, and on the Sabbath day he went into the synagogue, as was his custom. He stood up to read, and the scroll of the prophet Isaiah was handed to him. Unrolling it, he found the place where it is written:
‘The Spirit of the Lord is on me,
because he has anointed me
to proclaim good news to the poor.
He has sent me to proclaim freedom for the prisoners
and recovery of sight for the blind,
to set the oppressed free,
to proclaim the year of the Lord’s favor.’[f]
Then he rolled up the scroll, gave it back to the attendant and sat down. The eyes of everyone in the synagogue were fastened on him. He began by saying to them, ‘Today this scripture is fulfilled in your hearing.’”
If you grow discouraged that you seem to be the only person in your family who “truly cares” and who asks himself or herself, “How can we give each other expensive presents and enjoy luxurious feasting when there is so much injustice going on!” just remember that Jesus occasionally took his disciples aside for special meals and times of rest, and that He even went to a party or two (not to mention supplying wine at a wedding reception). It may be impossible for you to turn the activist in you off, but you can turn it down a few notches. There are 364 other days in the year when you can be fully engaged in your cause du jour. Enjoy your family and celebrate the Savior who stood up for justice as no one else ever has or ever will. Besides, when you honor your grandparents by making the day joyful and celebratory instead of filled with conflict and arguments, you win God’s heart: “Religion that God our father accepts as pure and faultless is this: to look after orphans and widows in their distress…” (James 1:2)
Also remember that life is about glorifying Jesus more than it is about glorifying your cause. This is a day to remember Jesus, to celebrate Jesus and to worship Jesus. He’s the reason you care, so it’s wise to give a day remembering, celebrating, adoring, and worshiping Him.
Caregivers
Christmas was made for you caregivers, in that the season celebrates giving and acts of kindness. It might seem weird to give neighbors free food or shovel their walkway during other times of the year, but during Christmas it becomes a way to celebrate the season, so go for it!
If you’re married to a caregiver, don’t be surprised if they want to invite a widow, a friend in recovery, or some kind of outcast who would otherwise be alone on this day. That person may not “fit” into your family but let your caregiver worship God by wanting to include someone else. They know they can’t feed and invite everyone, but they’ll enjoy the day so much more if they know they can make it more special for at least one other person.
If there’s a widow on your block, offer to hang her lights or bring in her Christmas tree. Do her shopping if she’s afraid of leaving the house. I love giving presents to my family members, but just as much, I treasure those moments when our family “adopts” another family. Last Christmas we went to Costco to pick up some much-needed items in the middle of Second’s outreach, “Angels of Light.” I passed a church member whose cart was filled with almost the exact same items.
“Angels of Light?” I asked.
“Of course!” he laughed.
Any guilt about spoiling a family member is eased a little bit when you know you’ve also invested in another family’s joy and celebration.
Your caregiving spouse is going to bring extra food to the family gathering, even though they’ve been told not to. And even if there was a “drawing” for Christmas gifts, you can bet the caregiver will have a few extra presents to hand out. “It’s not really a gift; I just saw it and thought you’d like it.”
A woman I work with has a wonderful “ministry” on the side that has blessed my family immeasurably. She’s the Zen master of Christmas gift wrapping and loves to do it. The first year my wife was very impressed, but also very suspicious, so I fessed up about who really wrapped it. Lisa loved having such nicely wrapped gifts to put in front of the tree though, so I’m inclined to take advantage of that caregiver’s heart year after year. She’s become a Christmas tradition in our family!
Whether your gift is shoveling snow, hanging up lights, cutting firewood, baking cookies, visiting someone who is going to be in the hospital or prison, you’re going to hang on to Jesus’ challenging words to His disciples: “You give them something to eat” (Matt. 14:16).
Another good passage for you to meditate on (which you probably already know by heart) is Matthew 25: 35-40:
“For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in, I needed clothes and you clothed me, I was sick and you looked after me, I was in prison and you came to visit me.”
“Then the righteous will answer him, ‘Lord, when did we see you hungry and feed you, or thirsty and give you something to drink? When did we see you a stranger and invite you in, or needing clothes and clothe you? When did we see you sick or in prison and go to visit you?’”
“The King will reply, ‘Truly I tell you, whatever you did for one of the least of these brothers and sisters of mine, you did for me.’”
Next week, we’ll complete this series by looking at how enthusiasts, contemplatives, and intellectuals can make the most of their Christmas season.
And one more thing: If you identify with any of these three pathways, please share with us some of your own favored practices in the comments. None of these are my primary pathway, so I might have left a few obvious practices out.
Read more about the Sacred Pathways: 9 Ways to Connect with God here….
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