Effing Feline belches #wewriwa

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I, Effing Feline, sometimes despair of my pet human, Ed. He’s a writer, a word person, who worked hard this week on a blurb for his latest WIP, The Seven Foot Cupid. But he got it all wrong! What he wrote (shown at the end of this blog) isn’t even close to a blurb. The Feline Dixionary of Human Foibles makes that quite clear, don’t you think?.

Color key:
Red = The first ten sentences
Brown = A few more, which you can skip if you’re bored

Ember took a deep breath and submerged her fears under a veneer of professionalism. Senior encros like her could handle the toughest, most dangerous situations this planet could throw at her, right?

At least she had been capable. Was she still, after the accident that made her a stranger? That was her personal reason for being here, over and above her orders. To find out if she still had what it takes.

She crept forward and parted tall grasses for a better look at the blasphemy-inducing scene. Although she observed for ten long minutes, no dangers appeared. Wind slithered down the dead volcano’s gentle slope, starting greenish-brown waves in a sea of grass. Thick clouds hid the sun and combined with the high altitude to make the breeze cool enough that she turned up the collar of her vest. A solitary insect — a corn-wallower, freshly hatched inside a kernel — landed on her hand. She shook it off. Addoray didn’t have many insects, but those it had bit hard.

To escape the bug, she stood and turned in a cautious circle. Still no visible dangers, so she edged warily down the bank toward the mystery in the middle of the wash.

Effing Feline here again. The Feline Dixionary of Human Foibles, 6th Edition, clearly states on page 187 that a blurb is:

a noise made by air released from the stomach through the mouth; a belch

The Dixionary couldn’t possibly be wrong, right?

Be sure to visit the other great writers in Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday.

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The Seven Foot Cupid

Book One in the Passion Island Trilogy

A locked-in-a-room romance

Ember prides herself on handling anything her newly colonized planet can throw at her. After a head injury shakes her confidence, she’s determined to prove herself again. She gets her chance when she’s ordered to explore a mysterious new cave.

Tyler, an explorer from a rival town, is given the same task. Like Ember, he’d been in an accident – – but his entire team died, leaving him drowning in survivor’s guilt. When he meets Ember, he’s drawn not only to her beauty and toughness, but by how well she deals with her accident.

Booker, a naïve Apprentice Cupid for a secret organization, receives his first assignment: get Ember and Tyler together. His strategy: lock them in an abandoned cabin together so they get to know each other.

He doesn’t realize he’s locked them in with . . . something else. Something dangerous. Something no human has ever seen.