Coronaviews #2, Interviews In The New Meat Cannery- New Orleans resident and Old Portland’s X-Ray Café freakazoan Benjamin Arthur Ellis.

Benjamin Arthur Ellis. Former Portland resident, former owner of the X-Ray Café from back in the day, a period now referred to as Old Portland, when for a brief window of time the dream machinery of the American collective unconscious manifested. Music was everywhere, our big bookstore was a marvel of cheap paperbacks, art flourished, and a food movement was born. It all went away because such things are impossible to sustain, and Benjamin Arthur Ellis is one of the things that went with it. But in his day, dear reader, Benjamin surfed the great creative wave with great dedication and skill. He was tied to that surge more closely than most, and the events of his life mirrored it in many ways. We had many adventures, me and Ben. For some years our acapella band The Lollipops, rounded out by Tres Shannon, opened gigs at Berbattis. One story to illustrate Ben’s surprising creative problem solving prowess- The night we opened for some big band, I forget who, and we had to wear suits. Ben’s was splendid, perfectly silver, even the shoes and tie. I wondered where he got the money for this finery and under the spotlights, as the suit began to melt, I discovered it was a Salvation Army ensemble. He’d spray painted the entire thing. Benjy fled to New Orleans when the lights dimmed and changed here in The City of Roses. Let’s check in with him and see what he’s got cooking here in episode two of Coronaviews, Interviews In The New Meat Cannery.

JJ- What up my dog mammal!

BE- In general, they’re trying to shut down this city. Up until about a week ago we had no documented cases in Nola at all. I think were up to 80 now, most of them right here. The response was fairly expedient. They had a press conference the other day with the governor and the mayor. We’re limiting shit. But we NOT BE LIMITING ACCESS TO ALCOHOL. A really weird declaration. It’s nice for them to comfort us in this time of need. So there’s that.

JJ- What are you cooking today? I have red beans on the stove for green chili enchilada pie.

BE- Cooking? I am not cooking today. I had a bunch of chili. I got some salad mix. Kathleen cook up a delicious focaccia bread so we got that. We got a big ole jug of whiskey. Sort of diminished at this point. Might have to deal with that. I’ve been sort of trying to make that a weekend thing but if we’re trapped we’ll see how that goes.

JJ- You have the immune system of a junkyard dog. I think you and Martinez have been sick once in the decades I’ve known you. Worried?

BE- Well, you know, that might be changing Jeffrey. They keep offering me a flu shot but I don’t care. But this year over the holidays I had the flue for like a month. That was the most difficult Christmas holiday. Since then I’ve been good, but I have a persistent cough, not good optics right now. Historically I’ve been immune to petty viruses. But I could die from the slightest breeze (laughs) I really have no idea!

JJ- The people of New Orleans. Tell us.

BE- Well I don’t know Jeff. I haven’t really left my house. They canceled some events, they canceled the St Patrick’s Day Parade and apparently people showed up anyway and they had to be dispersed by the police. Cops showed up. New Orleans is very attached to alcohol. This is a very red state, so FOX has been promoting that it’s all a libtard hoax. I’m almost in support of that, if republicans want to go of ignoring all precautions that’s probably fine with me. Panic might be worse.

JJ- Music? Is you band on hiatus? What creative things you doing?

BE- Not too much really. Haven’t had a regular band in some time. A few shows here and there. Trying to paint! But not too much of that. I retrieved an old high school sketch book from my parents, really great. My old teen angst was great for drawing. So I’m going in some new directions based on that. Doing a lot of carpentry and all that. Not so much art.

JJ- Last thoughts. Give us a pep talk.

BE- Uh. We’re all gonna die! Well you know, enjoy the time you have. Share quality time with your loved ones. But that’s pretty much my message to the American People. We’re all gonna die. Ain’t no big deal. People die all the time Jeffrey.

JJ- Groovy.

BE- Let me just say on a side note that when we get celebrity deaths, that’s when this is coming home. When Betty White goes under people are gonna lose their shit. Anyway. You guys still have toilet paper? Because as far as I can tell that’s the biggest problem so far.

One of my fav Ben ditties, Kiss You On The Moon, right here-

Ben Ellis- hero, scholar, frisbee champion, thinker and pottymouth