Conversation with a Canadian friend about healthcare

Me: Sarah! You're Canadian!


Sarah: Last time I checked....


Me: Do you want to know what I just found out? You guys get twelve free body massages a year! Twelve! Free! This is singularly the coolest thing I've heard about any country, ever! This beats even when you find out Australians have kangaroos that go through their garbage like they were raccoons or something, or learning that Icelandic chicks are incredibly hot.


Sarah: Well, it's not quite like that, see, you have to pay into a fund--


Me: --No no no no. Just tell me right now. Do you get 12 free body massages?


Sarah: Yes. I was planning on using one next week.


Me: Do you have any brothers?


Sarah: Two of them.


Me: Mmhmm. And how upset would you be if one, say, disappeared for a couple weeks, and then mysteriously reappeared looking and acting exactly like me? And even his old ID suddenly looked just like me too?