The secret
Yesterday, I had lunch with my aunt - who is also my godmother - and my uncle. They are very important to me. I must tell you that, apart from my husband and my two children, they are the only people around me who believe in me. It may not seem like much to you, but for me, it's huge.
I believe that it only takes one person to believe in you for your vision of yourself to change from nothing to everything. Besides, you don't exist alone. Isn't the only proof of our existence when another person confirms it to us with his gaze, or better yet, with his attention, or even better, with his love? But I'm getting lost....
My godmother and uncle are both 75 years old. They have been married for 50 years. They are physically and mentally fit; with them, I can discuss anything.
There is another person around me, 77 years old, who is not in the same conditions at all. This person is sick, often goes to the hospital because she often falls. But above all, she has regrets, she is not happy with the world as it is, she does not accept that we can have tastes and interests different from her own. Yet, this person is not a bad person at all.
So yesterday, I was at my godmother and uncle's house. We sit in the living room to have an aperitif. My godmother makes a delicious orange wine. I don't know the recipe, but all I can tell you is that it's sweet, not too alcoholic and super delicious! And here we are sitting, me in front of them. And suddenly I thought of the other person, who’s in hospital and looks to be twenty years older than they are. So I asked them both:
"How do you manage to be so fit, so well in your head, so open to the world around you?"
They didn't know what to say. I insisted:
"I would really like to know what the secret of your life is. Because I would like to age like you both and not like the other person."
"Every morning," said my godmother, who is a practicing Catholic, "I pray for my husband. And it works!" she added, smiling and convinced.
I know it works, because she also prays for me and that's what gives me the strength to persevere in my writing. How? Well, I say to myself: I can't let my godmother pray in vain for me, so I have to be worthy of the trust she puts in me and I wouldn't want her to disturb God for nothing! So, indeed, in a way, it works.
"Every day," my uncle answered, "I try to help my wife as best I can."
And the two of them started talking:
"First of all, it's a couple's love story. When we get married, we are young, blinded by love and novelty. Then you quickly realize that you have to adjust to the other. Make concessions. Find compromises for the education of children and how we want to live. Then the children leave. Suddenly, it's a great freedom... What are we going to do with it? Many couples lose their minds. But we have chosen to support each other again. And we did the right thing. Now that old age has made us fragile, we can count on each other, all the more so because we know each other well, because we know how much effort we have made to get there, how much each of us has sacrificed things for each other.
Then, it's a story of love for others. You have to love others. To love others is to accept them as they are. But that doesn't mean you have to love everyone or take care of everyone. We are responsible for our lives, everyone must be responsible for their own.
It's finally a love of life story. Loving life is not about kissing trees and dancing naked in the rain. Well, why not if the heart tells you? To love life is not to ruin the one you have. It's about doing what makes us happy so that we don't have any regrets. Of course, there are the imperatives of life, we don't always reach the goal we had imagined, but at least we have tried and we don't have any regrets."
So, am I not blessed to have these two people as my support? At Christmas, they will be surrounded by their children and grandchildren and will enjoy their quiet happiness.
In this month of December, when the Christmas magic is everywhere in the spotlight, I think we have to ask ourselves what does make it possible.
It is only the result of the magic of a successful life. And that magic exists because we work on it every day of our lives. The magic of life is built over time, after closing the novel with the last sentence: "...and they lived happily ever after."
It is not the Christmas magic that brings together the people you love around you at Christmas. It is the daily, hard (and not always done) work of giving, understanding, love throughout the year and every year that allows the Christmas magic.
I believe that it only takes one person to believe in you for your vision of yourself to change from nothing to everything. Besides, you don't exist alone. Isn't the only proof of our existence when another person confirms it to us with his gaze, or better yet, with his attention, or even better, with his love? But I'm getting lost....
My godmother and uncle are both 75 years old. They have been married for 50 years. They are physically and mentally fit; with them, I can discuss anything.
There is another person around me, 77 years old, who is not in the same conditions at all. This person is sick, often goes to the hospital because she often falls. But above all, she has regrets, she is not happy with the world as it is, she does not accept that we can have tastes and interests different from her own. Yet, this person is not a bad person at all.
So yesterday, I was at my godmother and uncle's house. We sit in the living room to have an aperitif. My godmother makes a delicious orange wine. I don't know the recipe, but all I can tell you is that it's sweet, not too alcoholic and super delicious! And here we are sitting, me in front of them. And suddenly I thought of the other person, who’s in hospital and looks to be twenty years older than they are. So I asked them both:
"How do you manage to be so fit, so well in your head, so open to the world around you?"
They didn't know what to say. I insisted:
"I would really like to know what the secret of your life is. Because I would like to age like you both and not like the other person."
"Every morning," said my godmother, who is a practicing Catholic, "I pray for my husband. And it works!" she added, smiling and convinced.
I know it works, because she also prays for me and that's what gives me the strength to persevere in my writing. How? Well, I say to myself: I can't let my godmother pray in vain for me, so I have to be worthy of the trust she puts in me and I wouldn't want her to disturb God for nothing! So, indeed, in a way, it works.
"Every day," my uncle answered, "I try to help my wife as best I can."
And the two of them started talking:
"First of all, it's a couple's love story. When we get married, we are young, blinded by love and novelty. Then you quickly realize that you have to adjust to the other. Make concessions. Find compromises for the education of children and how we want to live. Then the children leave. Suddenly, it's a great freedom... What are we going to do with it? Many couples lose their minds. But we have chosen to support each other again. And we did the right thing. Now that old age has made us fragile, we can count on each other, all the more so because we know each other well, because we know how much effort we have made to get there, how much each of us has sacrificed things for each other.
Then, it's a story of love for others. You have to love others. To love others is to accept them as they are. But that doesn't mean you have to love everyone or take care of everyone. We are responsible for our lives, everyone must be responsible for their own.
It's finally a love of life story. Loving life is not about kissing trees and dancing naked in the rain. Well, why not if the heart tells you? To love life is not to ruin the one you have. It's about doing what makes us happy so that we don't have any regrets. Of course, there are the imperatives of life, we don't always reach the goal we had imagined, but at least we have tried and we don't have any regrets."
So, am I not blessed to have these two people as my support? At Christmas, they will be surrounded by their children and grandchildren and will enjoy their quiet happiness.
In this month of December, when the Christmas magic is everywhere in the spotlight, I think we have to ask ourselves what does make it possible.
It is only the result of the magic of a successful life. And that magic exists because we work on it every day of our lives. The magic of life is built over time, after closing the novel with the last sentence: "...and they lived happily ever after."
It is not the Christmas magic that brings together the people you love around you at Christmas. It is the daily, hard (and not always done) work of giving, understanding, love throughout the year and every year that allows the Christmas magic.
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