The Who Behind What You Do

Who are you working for?

This is what I look at every morning when I get my day started. It’s one of my most valuable possessions. It was given to me by my wife for my first Father’s Day, just seven months after I became a Dad for the first time. My family matters more to me than anything. And yet sometimes, I find myself getting caught up in the “Why” of what I’m doing.

The reality is, everything I do is for them. And when I started to become more self-aware of this, I began to make the greatest strides of growth I’ve ever experienced. This epiphany for me has direct application to the life of love and happiness that you choose to live. When you’re clear in your purpose around what matters most, you’ll recognize that your Who for why you do what you do, is the people that you love and cherish the most.

Yes, we all want to succeed for ourselves. We all want the self-satisfaction that comes from doing something (the journey) that allows us to achieve that big “prize” we’ve always wanted (the result). And surely, each one of our journeys is deeply personal, idiosyncratic and unique to the fibers of who we truly are.

“Love recognizes no barriers. It jumps hurdles, leaps fences, penetrates walls to arrive at its destination full of hope.”
 — Maya Angelou

But the unifying thread in doing things for those we love is that it truly brings out the best inside all of us. This is what is natural. We were created to love. Created to provide and give to others in the hope of bettering them and lifting them up.

We start with our parents, in many cases, or our brothers and sisters. Sometimes it’s our aunts, uncles, cousins and friends.

And as we grow, and we become attracted to the man or woman that we love, we start giving ourselves and our contributions up for them. If you believe in a higher power like I do, then perhaps your gifts of love are also directed toward the almighty.

There’s an inextricable link between the love for what we do, with the people that we love the most. If you don’t have blind faith, hope and love for your life, then what’s the point? This is directed toward the people that you want to lift up, who are often right there lifting you up on your personal journey.

When you do what comes naturally in your daily activities, interactions, relationships and work, your most authentic and best output will shine through. When you’re just doing things for yourself, it cheapens the process. It’s ephemeral in its gratification. Long-lasting joy and love is authentic. It’s for others. It stands the test of time.

One of life’s great ironies is that you continue to discover yourself and find your best you when you stop worrying about “your ends,” and concern yourself with intentional, purpose-driven living for those that you love. Because those means to get there were already justified.

Part of being yourself is coming to terms with what makes you tick, what lights a fire inside of you and frankly, how you are able to positively affect the world. Whatever your outlet for doing that is — by all means dedicate the time and go for it! I just ask you to think deeper behind the people in your life. And to place them at the forefront of your thoughts each day.

Maybe it’s the vessel that provides you with that magic morning drink.

So I ask again,

Who are you living for?

No matter how hard we grind for the things we want, it’s always important to put in perspective who matters most. And who we’re really working for.

Go Farther

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The Who Behind What You Do was originally published in P.S. I Love You on Medium, where people are continuing the conversation by highlighting and responding to this story.