Clean, Clear Sentences
It's easy as a writer to be verbose. While surfing through the web site nybookeditors.com about line editors, I came across a helpful example of why it's important to write simple, clear sentences.
Original passage:
She reluctantly handed over her purse, and nervously waited to have it placed back in to her hands. She felt a rush of relief as the Security Guard finished his search after 30 seconds and handed it back to her.
Cleaner Version:
She was reluctant to hand over her purse, and felt a rush of relief as the security guard finished his search and placed it back into her hands thirty seconds later.
Original passage:
She reluctantly handed over her purse, and nervously waited to have it placed back in to her hands. She felt a rush of relief as the Security Guard finished his search after 30 seconds and handed it back to her.
Cleaner Version:
She was reluctant to hand over her purse, and felt a rush of relief as the security guard finished his search and placed it back into her hands thirty seconds later.
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