Elena Ferrante: ‘Is there a formula for a lasting relationship? A friend, married for 48 years, says there is

A friend, married for 48 years, says there is

The relationships of couples are an effective embodiment of the precariousness of our lives. If we meet someone we haven’t seen for several months, we hesitate to say: “Tell Franco hello from me.” It’s better to find out first, through circumspect questioning, if the relationship with Franco is still on, or if he has been replaced by a Gianni or a Giorgio, because even the most long-term relationships can end suddenly, and no one – today more than in the past – knows the formula for ensuring a marriage will last.

A very old friend of mine, who has been married for exactly 48 years, to a good man, says that in fact there is a formula: you just have to love each other. The problem, she adds in an amused tone, is that loving each other for a lifetime is really arduous.

Related: Elena Ferrante: ‘Solaris is not Tarkovsky’s best film, but it made the greatest impression on me’

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